THURSDAY, APRIL 7
8:00 FOX THE O.C. When Seth becomes chairman of a charity auction, Risky Business-style hijinx ensue!
8:00 BRAVO FORTY DEUCE Debut! A sexy new reality series centering around the hotsy-totsy dancers of LA’s hottest strip clubs.
FRIDAY, APRIL 8
6:00 MTV2 WONDER SHOWZEN A heee-larious and seriously twisted parody of Sesame Street, Teletubbies, and Zoom. My highest recommendation!
8:30 WB LIVING WITH FRAN Debut! Some idiot at the network thought it would be a good idea to bring back Fran Drescher (The Nanny) in a sitcom.
SATURDAY, APRIL 9
8:00 ABC LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE In this episode of the updated mini-series, Laura becomes “fascinated” with the neighboring Indians, and requests a little “wampum.”
8:30 TOON THE BATMAN In this new animated series, Batman takes a teenage Batgirl under his wing. Ewww.
SUNDAY, APRIL 10
8:00 NBC THE CONTENDER The contestants are instructed to “clean up the ghetto,” and then beat the shit out of each other.
8:30 FOX ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT Gob confronts the heckler who made fun of his magic on the “Girls with Low Self-Esteem” video.
MONDAY, APRIL 11
9:00 FOX 24 Audrey’s feelings for Jack begin to cool after seeing him go “Rambo” on a gang of terrorists.
TUESDAY, APRIL 12
9:30 NBC THE OFFICE It’s downsizing day, so Michael plans a birthday party to cheer the employees up.
10:00 FX THE SHIELD Vic and Monica take down a heroin ring (then comes marriage, here come Vic and Monica pushing a baby carriage).
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 13
8:00 WB SMALLVILLE A kryptonite explosion causes Lex to split into an evil and nice version. Yay! Kill the nice version!
8:30 FOX STACKED Debut! Pamela Anderson’s new sitcom about a pair of tits working in a bookstore.