It’s forgivable to not be aware that Mötley Crüe is playing a show in the Portland area tonight. It’s forgivable not knowing that it’s at the Sleep Country Amphitheater, in Clark County, Washington, which seems too embarrassed to even mention the show on its website. It’s forgivable to have no clue that the shamefully grotesque hair-metal band is actually still upright and functioning (barely) after a long, sordid history that’s been detailed countless times elsewhere. It’s forgivable to not give a shit that singer Vince Neil just had a court date postponed so that he could go on tour. It’s forgivable to not know that the court date is because he allegedly assaulted his girlfriend by poking her in the chest with his finger during a Las Vegas show. It’s forgivable to be doing your best to ignore bassist Nikki Sixx’s efforts to become a multicultural polyglot in the wake of his Crüe fame, hosting a radio show and publishing a book of fine-art photography. It’s forgivable to still find Tommy Lee a completely ludicrous individual, of which the least ridiculous thing about him is that his actual last name is Bass, despite the fact that he plays drums.
But I’ll tell you what’s NOT forgivable.
UNFORGIVABLE.
I saw Tommy Lee at the airport in Costa Rica last year. I tried to get my husband to follow him into the bathroom to check out the size of his knob for me, but he wouldn’t do it.
I’ve since left him, obviously.
In conclusion, I did not know about this show.
Motley Crew and Poison? The New York Dolls must be desperate.
Even though x many years ago, it was still one of the best shows I’ve ever seen.
The burrito story still cracks me up.
Is this an extra content on the Spinal Tap Blue-Ray Release?
Have you sen Mick Mars lately?
NOT GOOD.
Motley Crue do riff rock the fuck out here and there.