ONLY TWO WEEKS TILL THE ELECTION! EVERYBODY FREAK OUT!! The latest polling shows the race is neck-and-neck, with Ohio the state that will decide the whole shebang.
Obama Does Okay in Last Debate: The president might get a small ratings bounce from last night’s debate—looks like “horses and bayonets” is the new “binders full of women.”
America: Still Backward. A Louisiana woman says three men dressed like KKK members set her and her car on fire.
Pussy Riot to the Penal Colonies: The two imprisoned protesters are being shipped off to harsh, distant prisons.
Smoke Out: Uruguay is sick of fighting a drug war against marijuana, so its president is considering legalizing pot.
iPad Mini Is Coming: Yay! More things to buy!
BBC Sex Abuse Coverup: Brits are wondering why the BBC decided not to air an expose of a big sex scandal.
Can You Fire a Teacher For Being a Porn Star? A California teacher is appealing her school district’s decision to axe her just because she used to be in porn.
Who Reads the Most? In America, it’s teenagers, college-age kids, and 30-somethings—a laughably broad range, but still interesting.
First They Came for the Four Loko: The FDA has its targets set on Monster energy drink, just because it has led to deaths or something.
Terrible Crime: 21-year-old Gresham resident Whitney Heichel was shot four times, supposedly by a man she knew. Ugh.
Thank fucking god for Nate Silver. Without his reassuring 70% prediction, I might be packing for Canadia.
And who would ever have thought that the Presidential Election would be LESS lesser-of-two-evils than the PDX mayoral election?