Obama’s stimulus plan would give $150 billion toward education. What’s that, Republicans? You hate education? And American Indians could stand to get $3 billion from the bill. What’s that? You hate American Indians?

Though you can’t say the same for Sam Adams, President Obama had a pretty good first week.

Wells Fargo used our bailout money to buy Wachovia, and now they’re losing money, too—so it’s all even right?

Boeing (the airplane makers) cut 10,000 jobs.

The New York Times is reporting that their fourth quarter revenues dropped a whopping 48 percent.

Mickey Rourke (star of The Wrestler) has agreed to wrestle the WWE’s Chris Jericho at Wrestlemania 25. Mickey? Don’t. Just… don’t.

Baby bear Stephen Colbert hires Papa Bear Bill O’Reilly to be a special Colbert Report correspondent…
OR DID HE?!?

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

One reply on “Good Morning, News!”

  1. Adam’s had a great first week as mayor — multiple inaugural parties, great press, a “first 100 days” agenda, um, taken down from his website after a day, uh, nevermind.

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