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Dr. Fiona Hill hands corrupt GOP their asses.
Dr. Fiona Hill hands corrupt GOP their asses. Chip Somodevilla / Staff / Getty

GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! Don't go too fast, don't go too slow. You've got to let your body flow. I like 'em attentive and I like 'em in control. LET'S GO TO PRESS.

IMPEACHMENT UPDATE: Thanks to overwhelming evidence presented by career diplomats and members of the foreign service—take a peek at Fiona Hill's damning testimony from yesterday in which she scolded the GOP for doing the work of Vladimir Putin—even wishy-washy Democrats are fully convinced of Trump's guilt and are ready for an impeachment vote. While there are squeaks of disapproval for not hearing testimony from Trump cronies who are defying subpoenas, the Dems seem to be refusing to play their game, saying they've enough hard evidence to impeach.

Meanwhile the Republicans have launched headlong into their disinformation campaign, with Sen. Lindsay Graham starting a sham investigation into long-debunked claims about Biden and Burisma, while Trump gave a long phone interview for Fox News in which he attacked the impeachment hearings and the patriots who testified against his clearly criminal behavior.

The GOP is also considering whether they should have a short, two week senate hearing (in which they would exonerate the president) or a longer, more lie-filled proceeding (in which they would also exonerate the president). In any case—SURPRISE! They are going to exonerate the president.

In other Trump corruption news, the president is talking about vetoing near-unanimous legislation that would protect human rights in Hong Kong, because he thinks it would interfere with trade talks. Wait... Trump putting business interests over the safety of humans? WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT??

Former Fox News anchor Shep Smith, who left the network abruptly, made his first public speech yesterday showing his support for independent media (that *cough, cough* doesn't carry water for a corrupt president *cough, cough*) and made a half-million dollar donation to an organization that supports the free press around the world.

Democrats (including AOC and Warren) are hammering Facebook for the cozy relationship between Trump and Mark "Uncanny Valley" Zuckerberg.

Taylor Swift's war with her label continues as Scooter Braun issues a plea to the singer to come to the negotiation table because he's allegedly been getting death threats from her fans.

You guys... BABY YODA IS WEIRD. That is all.

IN LOCAL NEWS: Portland City Council has unanimously approved the Portland Street Response program that sends crisis workers and emergency responders instead of cops to the scene of low-threat 911 calls "like a non-violent mental health crisis, a report of someone camping on private property, or calls from people who need help accessing social services." AND OF COURSE, the Portland Police Union is against it. Our Alex Zielinski has the details.

An Oregonian investigation reveals that public housing authorities across the country have been ignoring the threat of the radioactive gas radon in the homes of tenants.

HEY SEXY PERSON! Today and tomorrow mark the FINAL WEEKEND of HUMP! 2019 so you better get your tickets right here. DON'T MISS THE FUN!

Now let's gaze above for a peek at the WEATHER: A nice, sunny Friday with a high of 51, and the rest of the weekend looks pretty good too.

And finally, going into my weekend like... (headphones on, sound up).