- London Zoo
- The foxy llama-keeper in question.
All hail Thursday! Let’s have some NEWS!
We’ll start strong this morning with this doozy: “A meerkat-keeper has been ordered to pay £800 in compensation after glassing a love-rival monkey handler in a row over a llama-keeper at a Christmas party,” according to The Guardian. These are special times, you guys. Special times.
Let’s also have some renters’ protections in Portland! City Council on Wednesday unanimously passed legislation requiring landlords to increase the amount of notice offered tenants when they’re either getting no-cause evicted or when the rent’s going up TOO DAMN HIGH to 90 days. The law goes into effect next month. I see a lot of rent increases and eviction notices coming before the end of October…
Despite those protections, 2015 is shaping up to be the most prosperous year yet for landlords, property managers, and real estate brokers, as area rents suggest an annualized growth rate of 14 percent.
And because we gotta keep the money in the hands of the people who already have plenty, Mayor Charlie Hales has chose to ax (see what I did there?) plans to charge developers a $25,000 tax for demolishing homes.
A Lake Oswego resale shop was robbed of $50,000 in merchandise by a group of thieves on Sunday. The shopkeepers say two women distracted employees by demanding “maximum customer service” at one end of the store while a male suspect scooped up jewelry from a case on the other side. Police are apparently calling this a “professional crew” and want the public’s help in finding them.
Know what’s not so professional? Getting caught delivering tampons stuffed with drugs to your incarcerated daughter. Twice.
Wanna buy the Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum, and the adjacent Wings & Waves Waterpark in McMinneville? Show up on the steps of the Yamhill County Courthouse on November 30 and you can buy it at auction. Apparently the foundation that owns the buildings is $1.9 million behind in payments to Hoffman Construction, but museum and waterpark officials plan to keep operating regardless of the pending sale. Wait, is this a no-cause eviction?
I think it’s time for some weather. Clouds and rain for us this weekend.
Now it’s time for some explosions. This guy in Missouri is SO METAL that he tried to put out a garbage fire with a van full of live ammunition. It went about as you’d expect it would go.
And finally: Don’t give the gun to the baby! A Washington Post reporter found that, on average in 2015, a person has been shot by a toddler (a kid under the age of three) one time per week. Most often, the toddler with the gun ends up shooting him or herself.
This ought to cheer you up after that last bit of news: