GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! When you love me tenderly, I don’t know if you’re for real. But I like the way I feel inside. LET’S GO TO PRESS.
So here’s one of the things that happens when you rush a messy, thoughtless tax bill into law—you get a lot of loopholes for companies and investors to exploit.
Racist, accused pedophile Roy Moore is officially a sore loser as well, and is suing to block the results of the Alabama senate election. (Psst! It’s not gonna work.)
More than 40 are dead, and many more injured after a bomb blast in the Afghan capitol of Kabul. ISIS is claiming responsibility.
Though Trump used to heap praises upon Michael Flynn, now the president’s legal team is set to brand him as a liar.
Trump claims that he has “signed more legislation” than any previous president. (Arrested Development narrator: “He hasn’t.”)
Trump gets beaten out in the popular vote AGAIN—this time by both Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton as “Most Admired Man and Woman.”
The beloved Solange Knowles has revealed that she has Autonomic Disorder, which affects the autonomic nervous system which control’s the body’s involuntary functions.
GOOD ADVICE:
2018 resolution: greet each new challenge with the enthusiasm of Orson Welles begrudgingly shilling for Peeps pic.twitter.com/LSJ53vWSXm
— desiccated caucasian beanpole (@samcorb) December 27, 2017
GUYS! It’s time to solidify your New Year’s Eve plans if you haven’t already! For help, check out the Mercury‘s must-have New Year’s Eve Party Mega List!
Now let’s look at the WEATHER: Rainy and warm today with a high of 50.
And finally, before putting a shock collar on your dog, maybe you should try it out on yourself first?
