Bad Parents! Credit: babylady.co.uk

Bad Parents!

  • babylady.co.uk
  • Bad Parents!

The world is a harsh place for today’s modern baby. If you have somehow avoided having little Aiden’s stroller chop his fingers off, or Isabella being strangled by her own crib, then you can pretty much be guaranteed that your child will be smothered lifeless by that fashionable sling you’ve been sporting.

The CPSC has issued a recall notice for Infantino Slings after three babies (including one in Salem) were suffocated and are preparing to issue a blanket (no jokes!) warning against baby slings in general.

So there you go, Blogtown parents. Cribs, strollers, and slings are out. Don’t try holding them, because you’re drunk. I guess it’s time to pick up one of those giant hamster balls at Target.

3 replies on “The Children Are Our Future and Our Future is Dying All Over the Place”

  1. I’ve seen the articles about this recall, but no one has broken it down for me. Does the thing just scrunch the kid up (like in the pic!) until it can’t breath, and the parents don’t notice? That’s pretty horrible.

  2. While I get that the Merc blog is typically a witty and entertaining site, I think January’s post is rather insensitive. The baby that died in Keizer was only 7 days old and literally suffocated while being held in this sling as the mother was grocery shopping. It’s just really sad and not something to be so glib about.

  3. Great. Put more fear in parents when they are trying to do something positive, by wearing their children. The issue is not the carrier (though maybe these infantinos are poorly designed) but error of usage.
    Not to be insensitive to the parents who lost infants, but the prevention to these deaths was looking down and checking on the baby.
    I have witnessed two different women, in two different places, wearing a newborn in a sling…and completely ignoring them. For over 20 minutes, and so obviously scrunched up.
    Newborns and young infants can not move to clear their airways. Their breathing is irregular and shallow. If you have them covered and left for an extended period of time they can die.
    Newborns and young infants die from being left in car seats and strollers for hours at a time. Why no recall or law there?
    Infants are safest in their mother’s arms, but not when they’re ignored.

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