Hello, Porkins. You are the last person I would ever want to see in a porno.

Anyway, here’s a (disappointingly) SFW trailer for Star Wars XXX. COME ON CHEWBACCA, MAKE SOMETHING HAPPEN WITH R2 ALREADY.

Via AICN, your source for all things having to do with Leia-related masturbation.

With honor and distinction, Erik Henriksen served as the executive editor of the Portland Mercury from 2004 to 2020. He can now be found at henriksenactual.com.