Good Derby Names: Smashlee Simpson, Babe Ruthless (Texas Rollergirls name), Maggie Mayhem (L.A. Derby Dolls)

In my spare time I like to come up with theoretical roller derby names (yeah… that is what I do in my spare time). But no one wants to be a big ol’ copy cat, right? So I check my names against the international roller derby roster to see if they’re already taken. Like my big epiphany name, the Twin Peaks-tastic Laura Palm Her: TAKEN by an LA Derby Doll (mutter, mutter, knife that bitch). But my newest name is free and clear: Sally Druthers!

How about yours?

Good Derby Names: Smashlee Simpson (taken by Drew in Whip It), Babe Ruthless (Ellen, and a Texas Rollergirls name), Maggie Mayhem (Kristen, and L.A. Derby Dolls name)

  • Good Derby Names: Smashlee Simpson (taken by Drew in Whip It), Babe Ruthless (Ellen, and a Texas Rollergirls name), Maggie Mayhem (Kristen, and L.A. Derby Dolls name)

Mercury copy chief and appreciator of the most sophisticated form of comedy: PUNS!

35 replies on “Let’s Play What’s Your Derby Name!”

  6. Why are you trying to think up roller derby names, Courtney? Mmmmmmm??? Also, I can play this game! When I re-considered roller derby a couple years back, these were a few of the names I was tossing around:

    Betsy Blue Balls

    Amazon (dot) Commie

    Fag Hagatha

    Bettie Buttcheck

    Suck My Dickies

    Embolism

    Menstrual Rea

    Bridget Burner

  9. Elbowa Virus

    Cleosplatsra

    Scarriet Tubman

    Laura Ingalls Wildest

    Concealed Carrie Nations

    Constance Baker Motley Scrue

    Susan Bitch Anthony

    Most of those are probably taken….

  11. Yes! I was thinking so hard about this a couple of weeks ago. (I thought about the name, not the time commitment and exercise.) Some ideas:

    Katy Scary
    Amelia Air Heartbreaker
    January Moans
    Drew Barrywhore
    Fuckin’ Magnets
    Miley Pscyho

    and Bonnie Mayhem (my mom’s name is Bonne Mae)

    Also Joneser, of course.

  12. Helen Smearin’

    Le Vag Aux Folles

    Pussy Galore, Not the ‘James Bond’ Character, But Rather the Roller Derby Player With A Sexually Suggestive Name

    Kindalezzy Rice

    Queen LaCheatah

    Sinead O’Killer

    Natalie Merchant of Death

    Hannah Black Pantha Montana

    Miley Die-rus

  35. Please help me! I recently joined a roller derby team and need help with a name. My name is Sarah Tice. I’m 26 years old and have my Doctorate in Physical Therapy. I’m a fitness freak, I love crazy challenging things, I love the beach, reality TV, and being outdoors, I live in Troy Pennsylvania, even though i love being outdoors I am very girly and love makeup and clothes 🙂 I was trying to think of a name to play off my career as a Physical Therapist but i’m struggling!

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