Everyone can play in the NBA. Everyone except Allen Iverson, that is.

  • Everyone can play in the NBA. Everyone except Allen Iverson, that is.

The NBA lockout is a boring, boring time. And that’s not just for us depressed fans, even the teams and players have grown restless. Hell, even Martell Webster wants to be an unpaid intern.

No strangers to awkward white guys clogging up the lane, the Milwaukee Bucks found a novel solution to the boredom: invite Bon Iver over to shoot some hoops. A few weeks back Justin Vernon and pals were able to run wild at the Bucks’ vacant practice facility, which is exactly what the Portland Trail Blazers should do. I know more than a few local basketball playing (or Rigsketball playing) rock stars that would kill for a chance to play on the same court at the Blazers.

I’ll gladly organize the game, just as long as I get to play… and get to park in Paul Allen’s spot… and get my own customized jersey. Fine, you don’t have to get me the jersey. I have my own.

Ezra Ace Caraeff is the former Music Editor for the Mercury, and spent nearly a third of his life working at the paper. More importantly, he is the owner of Olive, the Mercury’s unofficial office dog....

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