Dust of them pom poms, because the Trail Blazers are looking for a few good BlazerDancers to dance during timeouts, grind during on-court injuries, and probably attend car shows or something. Isn’t that what BlazerDancers do? Oh, and make a bikini calendar. There is always a bikini calendar.
Open auditions will be this Sunday at the Wonder Ballroom, the jazz hands and leg kicks start at 3:45 pm. When the dust (spandex?) settles, they’ll have 32 contestants. From there, they narrow it down to 16, but to be honest, it gets really confusing. It’s like selection sunday or something.
Press release will explain everything:
The 2008-09 BlazerDancers, presented by NAPA Auto Parts, will consist of 16 dancers, who will be chosen from among the field of 32 finalists who have already survived three rounds of cuts.
Members of last year’s BlazerDancers squad received a bye into this year’s finals, but must audition against 16 new finalists to earn a spot on the team. Finalists will perform two previously choreographed routines and an original one-minute solo for the panel of eight judges (including former BlazerDancer and American Gladiators star Monica Carlson).
Comcast Sports Net Northwest will be on hand to film the auditions for a reality TV show that will air this fall. Trailblazers.com will also be on hand to provide multimedia coverage of the event.
I’m reading a lot of words–American Gladiators, reality show, Trailblazers.com live blogging a dancing tryout–but none of them are addressing the real off-season dilemma facing the Blazers; the mascot, Blaze. How about tryouts for a new mascot? I heard Squatch needs work. We love that guy.
Blaze OUT
Blazer dancers OUT
The NBA is so cookie cutter and boring now they have to distract you with tits, ass, piped in music and a retarded cat. Remember when Portland had some of the best fans in the league? Oh wait…then they outpriced their real fans so they could sell seats to people who are there to be seen.
Please note typo in first line,
Ditto Garrett,
Not funny,
Next!
Hey, doesn’t the Mercury have some cute writers who want to shake their bottoms? As a frequent reader, I strongly encourage some in-depth coverage.
I hope the Blazer organization has hired a new director, coach, brand manager for the Blazerdancers. They are the saddest danceteam in the league. These are 20 somethings, and need a NEW, fresh, sexy makeover. Their uniforms are outdated, too conservative and unflattering for their figures. They need a new website and no more bikini calendars where they are cut in half, bad photos on the last one. I like the Blazerdancers, just bring them into the year 2008.