I went to my first Trailblazers game ever last night and although the energy was great and the guy next to me in Section 300 with a wicked mullet shouting “SHOOT IT!” every few moments was great and Blaze the Trailcat was great, what really struck me was that I have never, ever seen a crowd so genuinely enthusiastic about Taco Bell Chalupas.
- CHA -whoop whoop – A!
Trailblazers games are punctuated with corporate giveaways, ranging from the “fun game” of an audience member guessing the price of a Home Depot cordless drill to a giant Ford blimp that poops out free Whopper coupons. When the Blazers hit their 100th point, suddenly the Rose Garden Jumbotron flashes images of savory Taco Bell Chalupas and on cue the thousands of screaming Blazers fans chanted “CHA-LU-PA! CHA-LU-PA!” Every time the Blazers score 100 points, audience members all win free Chalupas.
As the audience filed out after the game, senior citizens stood at every exit door, handing out small coupons for a free Chalupa. I didn’t know what a Chalupa was, exactly (sort of a bastard taco?) so I took my free Chalupa coupon and moments later tried to find someone else to give it to. I have no need in my life for a “chewy, crispy shell” layered with seasoned beef. But here’s an idea: why doesn’t a homeless group set up shop outside the Rose Quarter every Blazers game and rake in the free Chalupas, since there are probably thousands of people like me who grab a coupon and then don’t really want it? The coupons don’t expire for a year, a homeless group could hand them out en-masse to hungry people and Portland’s homeless would have a few more pounds of seasoned beef in their stomachs every year.
Aaaannnddd I just solved homelessness. Thank you, thank you.
Your first game ever, Sarah? Really?!
Hope you had fun (sounds like you did). You should try and get closer seats next time, though. It’s more fun the closer you get (and the further you get from the Vantuckians with mullets).
The rescue mission and various homeless shelters around town will take these. If we ever get them at a game we stick them in an envelope and mail them over there.
I wouldn’t expect such advocacy for cruelty to the homeless from you Mirk, I am kind of surprised.
Jackattack,
I’ve had a great time watching games from sports bars before, but had never actually gotten a ticket to a game. This one was free, thanks to my intelligent and attractive friend Emily.
Good info on the Rescue Mission. Thanks, BlackedOut.
If you swipe a Safeway Card at Safeway, they charge you less. If you don’t, your receipt will say “You COULD have saved $X.XX!” As a cashier, I once saw someone walk away from “You could have saved $75!” but $10 or even $20 happened multiple times a day.
But the thing is – if you come back with a Safeway card and that kind of receipt, any cashier can give you back that money! And Safeway cards are free for anyone.
If I was homeless, I’d hang around that Safeway downtown. Check out the receipts people throw away as they leave – I’m sure you’ll find a $30 or $40 ticket within a couple of hours. That’s a lot of chalupas.
First Trailblazers game AND no idea what a Chalupa was?! C’mon, I know the Mercury staff is proud to be all indie rock and whatever, but a little network TV time might do some good by getting you in touch with what most Portlanders (despite claims of ultra-hipsterism) are familiar with.
Still, your plan is a good one. And it’s not so much that we like the Chalupas, it’s how they were obtained.
Did you catch the gratuitious Chris Dudley self-promo for Gov.?
dimag05,
Yes! I thought it was funny that he declined to participate in the OLCV governors race debate on Tuesday night, but had plenty of time to stump to the crowd on Wednesday.
a chalupa is a little boat
Dear god, I love my blazers but I loathe the chalupa chant. I get embarrassed for our city, if a chalupa chant begins.
Chris Dudley’s “Dudlers” were outside harassing people on the way in. Very low-class. I’m surprised they even allowed him to use his “Blazer-ness” to tout his campaign.
Classless.
I went for free last night, as well, Sarah. I was with my intelligent and attractive wife, though. 🙂 I can’t afford Blazers games plus Comcast has just about all of them on for free.
So they’re “giving away” junk food produced filled with government-subsidized factory-farm meat? Ha! Nothing is free the American taxpayers, the environment and the cows are paying for it.
Well, of course we were going to have a surplus of cows after feeding them all that govt-subsidized corn.
If the Blazers make a certain number of 3-pointers in the first half, everyone gets as coupon for a free egg mcmuffin, so it’s possible to leave the Rose Garden with breakfast and lunch for the next day take care of.
I guess they could eat the filling and make a house out of the shells. They’ll still need property to park their Chalupa-mansion.
They do the chalupa thing for every NBA game in every city.
At a game in Phoenix a few years ago, the home team scored 100 points and I walked out with a chalupa coupon. I ran into a homeless guy and was given a story about how starving he was and needed money. He hadn’t eaten in days. I had no change, so I offered my free chalupa coupon. He declined the offer and told me to basically fuck off.
That ended my days of giving.
Are you kidding me Sarah! Do you know how much your little idea would cost this city. The budget for public toilet construction would be outrageous let alone the costs for repairs for ruptured pipes. Homelessness ended = fiscal outlook in the toilet.
I’m not sure which route you take out of the Rose Garden, but I have frequently seen homeless folks waiting just outside of Rose Quarter property during games. I once saw a homeless dude with at least 80 chalupa coupons under the I5 overpass. The bored look on his face told me that he had done this often.
Sad thing is, homeless folks aren’t lacking for crappy food – there’s plenty of Jesus-Costco-Lasagna every night. What’s lacking is funding for a bed and help to get out of the endless loop of despair.