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I thought we already had a whites only basketball team, and they were called the Utah Jazz. Zing!

A Georgia resident named Don “Moose” Lewis is attempting to start a “whites only” league in a dozen different Southern (shocking, right?) cities. Lewis believes that white players are getting the shaft “due to the proliferation of non-organized play.” Would this league include 7-foot high rims for the “organized” players to dunk on? Will John Stockton-esque short-shorts be required as well? Will any of the teams take Steve Blake off the Blazers’ hands?

Of course, the odds of this hateful league ever getting off the ground are next to impossible. But this story does lift the rock on a culture that was previously foreign to me—racist NBA fans. Who knew such people existed? It must be a real bummer to witness nightly highlights of “non-organized play” from a league full of minorities and international players. It almost makes me feel sorry for them. Well, almost.

Ezra Ace Caraeff is the former Music Editor for the Mercury, and spent nearly a third of his life working at the paper. More importantly, he is the owner of Olive, the Mercury’s unofficial office dog....

18 replies on “Whites Only Basketball League to Please Racists, Fans of Sensible Passing”

  1. When Augusta mayor, Duke Copenhaver, begins a campaign toward opening the doors of the many “Black Only” institutions (Universities, TV Networks, Pageants, etc., etc.) to “White Americans”, then, and only then, will this guy admonish Don Lewis regarding his efforts to establish an “All White Basketball League”…

    Not likely, though, that Copenhaver would take up such a challenge, so kinda’ hope the dip-shite goes to hell…

    And I wish Don Lewis both all the luck in the world and hope that he succeeds.

    Catch ya’ later,
    Mike

  2. To: Fenton: There are no “Black Only” universities. ALL of the Historically Black Colleges and Universities accept people of all ethnicities – always have. BET is owned by Viacomm (white), and famously had a white “Champion” of their “Black” comedy contests. And you may have heard of the Black congregation that recently ordained an ex-Klansman as minister. Black Pageants date back to a time when Black people were excluded from Miss America, etc. Maybe you think Black folks should just roll up all traditions and customs immediately upon acceptance into similar white customs. How naive.

  3. Aren’t there black only events? Just saying. United Nego College Fund, NAACP, Miss Black America, ect… But a whites only is not PC enough huh?

  4. As a Utah Jazz fan I am disgusted by your jokes Ezra. You have insulted our state and every African American player or coach to every be affliliated with the Utah Jazz.

  5. If a whites only league is dumb, racist and not PC. I say no more NAACP, United Negro College Fund, or Miss Black America, ect. Are you with me? What’s with all the bashing of the south by the way. That’s the same steroetypical type ignorance you are railing agianst in the first place. Maybe you Portlanders should lay off all the coffee or whatever you guys are stereotypically up to. See my point?

  6. Really, do idiotic racists just sit around all day looking at link trackbacks to troll stories about this? Do they have that kind of wherewithal? Or are there just more lurkers here than I realize? Regardless, as a native Georgian, this doesn’t surprise me one bit, and it gets added to the extensive list of reasons I’m thankful I got the hell out of there.

  7. I am a racist, I am literate, college educated, not a redneck and still proud to be racist. I wish this team well and will buy one of the first tickets offered. Go team, go league!!

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