This is it, folks: the last True Blood discussion group of the season.
- “Hurry up, the Dresden Dolls go on at 9:00!”
It’s the finale! Finally all of our questions answered!
Or… not. In what is becoming a True Blood tradition, this finale was pretty weaksauce. I’ve been wondering how most of the plot points brought up this season were going to be resolved and the answer, I should have guessed, is that they wouldn’t really. What did happen this episode?
Well, Russell got a concrete mudpack thanks to Bill and Eric. Then Bill tossed Eric in, too (don’t worry everyone, he got out). Then Bill ordered Pam to die (don’t worry everyone, she’s ok). Then it was revealed from Eric – whose skin looked great! – that Sophie-Anne originally sent Bill to study Sookie the fairy. Not only did he know all along that she was a fae, but he vampire-date-raped her by making her drink his blood, which is pretty fucking shady. So they broke up (don’t worry Hugh Hefner, they’ll get back together). Oh yeah, and Sookie disappeared to fairyworld. Gasp!
- Sookie (on the left)
Soooooo what else happened?
Lafayette is still freaking out from the V he and Jesus did. We finally learned what a Jesus is – a witch, I should have guessed! – but there’s no real reason to distrust him yet. Right? How do you guys feel about Jesus the brujo?
Also, Hoyt asked Jessica to marry him (squeee!!) and move into a tract home where they’ll live happily ever after. UNLESS Mama Hoyt and her shotgun have something to say about it!
Jason is now the protector of Panther Ranch. He is also, surprise, probably not going to be a cop. That’s ok, because he will be too busy policing the noble cougar people.
Tara, in the grand tradition of so many sad cinematic characters before her, took a good, long, soul-searching look in the mirror and decided to cut her hair. “Needle in the haaaaaaaayyyyyyy….”
She is a changed woman! She isn’t even bothered that her mother is fucking Rev. Dennis. It is the end of the Tara that we all know and hate and the beginning of a new Tara to get to know and hate.
In perhaps the greatest tragedy of the night, we found out that Tommy can’t read! Oh, and he might be dead. Does that mean we don’t get another storyline to follow where Tommy travels up and down the coast getting into trouble?
And that was the season. What did you guys think? Where you satisfied with this, the third season of True Blood? Did the finale leave you wanting more?
Stray notes and quotes
Poor Talbot got flushed down the disposal.
Alcide showed up, too. Man, he and Sookie do not have the sexual chemistry the writers seem to think they do.
If Eric could get out of the concrete that easily, what’s stopping Russell?
What the fuck does Godric want from Eric? He was irritating the hell out of me.
“You a witch who’s a nurse who’s a dude?”
Which would you rather date: a vampire, a werewolf, a shapeshifter, a brujo, a maenad, a fairy, or a cougarperson?
Weaksauce indeed!
Three thoughts
-Last night old meanie Sookie was all giggly and eeeeevil grin-ey while flushing Talbot down the drain-Huh??? Despite being a very cool moment, that seemed out of character and was unconvincing. Where are the writers going with these occasional flashes of “I don’t give a damn Sookie” scenes paired with “sobbing by dead gramma’s grave Sookie.”
-I agree that the float-ey ghost Godric was irritating. Yes, T.B. writers we all know Eric has feeeeelings, and viewers should empathize with him now. We are all set up for next season, thank you. No need for vampire Jiminy Cricket.
-Jessica is right-that place needs some painting. . . . Oh, Gross, a dirty doll on the floor! And that was the highlight of the finale for me. . . sigh
Ummmm, yeah. Weak and kinda filler-y for a finale. I know, i was wondering why Russell couldn’t break out of the handcuffs in the last episode, seeing as how he is the most powerful vampire ever, or get out of the concrete in this one?
To answer your last question, I guess a shapeshifter.
Yeah a very anticlimactic finale.
And while I’m glad Russell will be back, Bill and Eric were very nonchalant about this when they were encasing him in cement… They really want to deal with him in 100 years (or more likely, next season)?
Things this season I could have done without: meth-cooking panther family
shapeshifting Merlottes
Tara
Things I want more of:
Nan Flanagan
Pam
I thought they implied that Pam helped Eric escape from the concrete…wasn’t there some line of hers where she said she was still getting concrete out of her hair?
@iriley
You must be right. I think I assumed that Eric’s assassin did something to her to elicit that comment. I really would’ve enjoyed seeing Pam take the assassin out rather than just telling us.
That clears up the Russell thing, though. I wonder if he has some fanatic followers who’re gonna dig him up?
@autumn
I think I’d be jealous of a shapeshifter. I’d like to date a bruja that can take me to chill with my ancestors.
I find this whole Jason storyline irritating. If they’re gonna take the adorably irresponsible horn dog to new levels of self-awareness and maturity, do they have to make him do it because of a bunch of inbred “Hills Have Eyes” type of shifters as Crystal and the Hot Shot crowd? Yuk! Are we supposed to believe that she’s such a good lay that after what- only a couple times together? – he’s willing to take responsibility for her whole uncle-daddy family without her even being there?
And what was up with this crazy evil Sookie laugh? It just looked bizarre.
Didn’t anyone else get the impression Tara was going to off herself? One can only hope. And… best lip quiver EVER this episode! We actually got an extreme close up this week. P.S. Her hair looks awful. Wish they’d give more air time to Pam rather than Tara. I love Pam.
I agree- no chemistry between Alcide and Sookie. Nip that. She and Eric are hot though. It’s a tad voyeuristic watching her and Bill, now that they’re married in real life.
I’d do a shifter. Unless we’re talking about Eric. I’d do him no matter what he was.
Please oh please let Bill not be the one vampire who leaves his house alive after the airborne fight with Queen Louisiana. Please! If possible, maybe Tara could stop by just in time to get impaled on something? With that new hair, she’d look great in a casket.
That said, they did clear out some annoyances — Hillbilly Father, other hillbilly, Eric’s assassin. Speaking of that, how on earth are we supposed to believe that Panther Girl’s “owner” a) shoots his own father b) shoots his own brother, or cousin, or brother-cousin, whatever, and then c) declines to shoot Jason? Why wouldn’t he shoot Jason? No seriously, couldn’t someone shoot Jason? I realize that would mean we wouldn’t find out what would become of his high school football records, but I can live with that.
Sam has grown a spine. Good. His brother needs to get interesting or make sure that bullet hits him right in the heart.
I agree: more Lafayette, more Pam, more Queen Louisiana, more Eric. Alcide needs to do something more than be mopey and sweet and shirtless, but he has potential. There can never be enough Eric, and we’re stuck with Sookie regardless. There’s no way Russell is staying in that concrete for more than an hour. I hope he stays scorched n’ crusty for a while — it’s a good look.
Jessica deserves better than Hoyt — by that I mean, she deserves me. I’m not better than Hoyt, come to think of it, I’m just saying she deserves me.