AdWeek calls the new Ibis Hotel “Snuggling Bunnies” spot “the year’s most shamelessly adorable commercial.” BUT IS IT REALLY? Yes, you have baby bunnies cuddling together on an impossibly soft bed… but I sincerely can’t tell if it’s “cute.” Years of incessantly mean internet comments have sucked every last “feeling” from my dried husk of heart (thanks for that, by the way)—so now I need other people to tell me when something is actually adorable or not. To me, it just looks like dinner.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=0o_5ZFt7U38

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)