By Brian Brait, Evan James, Justin Sanders, Katie Shimer, and Marjorie Skinner
Photos by Burk Jackson
820 Lounge
820 N Russell, 460-0820, Mon-Sat 5-6:30 pm
Delicious food including a huge Caesar and rotating cast of soups and sandwiches for under $5, plus an abbreviated drink menu offers genius drinks for $4. Super swank, dark bar atmosphere makes even your coworkers look good. KS
Alibi
4024 N Interstate, 287-5335, Daily 3-7 pm
While the Alibi tiki bar’s weekday happy hour offers cheap apps from 3-7 daily, you might want to hit it on Saturday or Sunday, when you get $2.50 Bloodys and Screwdrivers all day long. Hot damn, it’s like they read my wish list. KS
Andina
1341 NW Glisan, 228-9535, Tues-Fri 4-6 pm
Exotic Peruvian drinks for $4, and food for $2. Highlights include the Solano cocktail–a combo of Makers and lime juice, plus cinnamon and clove, and food options like the parmesan crusted scallops, mussels, or their simple quinoa salad. KS
Aura
1022 W Burnside, 597-2872, Wed-Sun 4:30-6 pm
Aura’s arty food actually tastes great. Try the chicken burgers, skewers, or fondue, all for $3. Select drinks are also discounted, including Aura’s incredible margarita. All that, plus the décor is like a sci-fi movie. KS
Bernie’s Bistro
2904 NE Alberta, 282-9864, Tues, Thurs, Fri & Sat 4-6 pm & 10-midnight; Wed all night
The star of Bernie’s happy hour is the amazing and CHEAP FOOD! $3 a plate gets you heapin’ helpins’ of mac & cheese, salmon po’ boy, deep-fried pickles, fried green tomatoes, and a whole lot more. Plus, they make a mean-ass Mojito. BB
Bonfire Lounge
2821 SE Stark, 232-3704, 5-7 pm daily, $2 well all night on Mondays
Bonfire doesn’t discount their food, because it’s super-cheap already. Their Portabella mushroom gyros are spectacular, as is the mango and black bean Hellfire Burrito, if you can stand the heat. Head over on Monday for cheap drinks all evening, or just enjoy the $2.50 micros and $2 well from 5-7 nightly. KS
Canita
503 W Burnside, 274-4050, Tues-Sat 2-6:30
Get off work early and take full advantage of colorful Cañita’s incredibly long happy hour. Try a sampling of Cuban delights with their meat-stuffed empanadas, beet or corn salad, and deep-fried plantains–all $2.50. Sangria, daiquiris, Dos XX, and a delicious coconut milk and lime concoction, the Ricky Ricardo, are discounted, too, running you about three bucks each. Holy cheap. KS
C-Bar
2880 SE Gladstone, 230-8808, Daily 5:30-7 pm
C-Bar’s new menu (coming next week) will feature both TV dinners and seven different kinds of dips. That means a new dip for each day of the week. While you’re dipping, try sake cocktails at reduced prices. Don’t forget $1 off all draft beers. Snugly nestled in a semi-industrial district so you can enjoy a dip after a long day at the steel mill. EJ
Crush
1412 SE Morrison, 235-8150, Tues-Sun 4:30-6 pm
Crush makes some of the freshest vegetarian/vegan-friendly food in town, offering sunflower hummus, garlic baba, olive tapenade, and homemade soup, all for $3. Plus they offer a bunch of martinis made with fresh juice for $3 and all liquor martinis for $4. An after-work glass of red wine will run you $4 and beer’s $2. Cheap, delicious, and cheap. KS
Dining Room
NE 24th & Fremont, 288-5500, Daily 5-7 pm
If you haven’t tried this elegant little Fremont eatery, you should, because their food is fantastic. Happy hour offers a healthy sampling of the goods, including shrimp scampi, calamari, fried ravioli, and a free range Oregon beef burger all for under $5; and if you’re lucky, they’re served up by a sexy French guy. KS
Dragonfish
909 SW Park, 10 pm-midnight nightly
Downtown drunkards can rejoice at the Dragonfish Café, which offers a basic menu of cheap sushi EVERY NIGHT from 10 until midnight. Get four sushi rolls for $1.95, or a piece of nigiri (the equivalent of about two rolls) for just $1.45. Plus, pints of good beer for just $2.75! JWS
East
322 NW Everett, 226-1569, Mon-Tues All Night, Wed-Fri 5-8 pm, Sun 6-10 pm
Lose yourself in an extremely fancy, ultramodern egg chair while enjoying $3 well, $2 draft, and $1.50 PBR. Choose from an affordable pan-Asian menu and revel in the hidden charm of the Pearl. EJ
Equinox
830 N Shaver, 460-3333, Wed-Fri 4-6 pm
Hamburgers and fries, Asian spring rolls, mac & cheese, and banging Mediterranean food for $3. Drinks for cheap, cheapo. KS
Green Papaya
1135 SW Morrison, 248-2112, Mon-Sat 4-6 pm
During this dreamlike two hours, Green Papaya’s rich, dessert-like coconut gulf prawns, cream cheese-filled wontons, crispy rolls, and much more will run you only two little dollars. Order one of their lychee martinis, and prepare to chow down. This is seriously some of the best Vietnamese food in town. Hey, I’m rhyming. KS
Gustav’s
Bier Stube
5035 NE Sandy Blvd, 288-5503, 3-6 pm and 9-close Sun-Thurs, 10-close Fri-Sat
If you feel like getting your gluttony on, head to Gustav’s happy hour. The cheese fondue is awesome, and really bad for you, especially when you dip some sausage in it. They also offer fish and chips, and a Caesar salad to make yourself feel better. None of the food costs over $5, and they offer beer on special, too. KS
Holocene
1001 SE Morrison, 239-7639, Mon-Fri 5-7 pm
The antithesis of a dark smoky bar, you can relax on a pretty couch sipping $1 well drinks, $4 specialty drinks, and nibbling on rotating food specials from Holocene’s menu of delicacies like crab cakes and crepes. All that, and your clothes won’t even smell bad. MS
Heathman
1001 SW Broadway, 790-7752, 4-6 pm daily
As far as the downtown fancy hotel bars go, the Heathman is pretty middle-of-the-road, but it’s a comfy joint with a happy hour you can count on from 4-6 pm every day of the week. No drink specials, but a killer bistro menu that includes a decent burger for $3.50 and steamed mussels in a curry sauce (yum!) for $4. JWS
Jake’s Grill
611 SW 10th, 220-1850, Mon-Thurs 2-6 pm & 9:30 pm-12 am; Fri 3-6 pm & 10 pm-1 am; Sat 10 pm-1 am; Sun 3-11 pm
The drinks may be priced normally at swanky Jake’s, but the happy hour food specials are amazing. With a $2 minimum beverage purchase, you can choose off of their $1.95 happy menu, which includes a 1/2 pound cheeseburger, salads, and damn fine oyster shooters. MS
Poor Richard’s
3907 NE Broadway, 288-5285, 5-7 pm nightly
My favorite old person two-fer-one steak place offers two-fer-one shots in the form of doubles. Grab a double whiskey soda with your NY strip and baked potato. There’s nothing more fitting after a long day at the office, or Kinko’s–whatever. KS
Portland
City Grill
111 SW 5th, 30th floor, 450-0030, 4:30-6:30 & 10-midnight daily
Even though you’re entering a fratty, yuppie cheesefest, the view and food are worth enduring the company. The burger is hand-pattied, huge, and one of the best in town; the mussels are fresh and the seared tuna is amazing. Choose from about 20 items (crab cakes, pot stickers, salads), and get fancy full. KS
Portland
Steak and
Chophouse
121 SW 3rd, 223-6200, 3:30-6:30 & 9:30-close nightly
The Chophouse offers a plethora of generously portioned dishes, and for just $1.95. Cheapass-yet-tasty appetizers include thin-crust pizzas, salads, a white cheddar burger, and shrimp cocktail. While you’re eating cheap, spend time scoping for a sugar daddy from the upstairs hotel. KS
Ringside
2165 W Burnside, 223-1513, Daily 9:45-Midnight
Hosting my favorite happy hour in town, Ringside’s two-dollar food includes a great burger, four oyster shooters, a big Caesar, a French dip, steak bites, etc. Drinks are regular prices, but with food this good, who cares? KS
Rose &
Raindrop
532 SE Grand, 238-6996, Mon-Fri 4-6 pm & 10-midnight
Two and four dollar food makes paying for those delicious, fresh juice Rose & Raindrop drinks all the nicer. Try a bowl of soup or fish taco for $2 or their huge juicy burger for $4. KS
Slabtown
1033 NW 16th, 223-0099, Mon-Sat 4-7 pm, All Day Sunday
Rumored to be “always fun.” Slabtown’s menu features a hamburger and fries, quesadillas, and sausages all priced at $3. Come eat bratwurst after work, or enjoy bratwurst from dusk ’til dawn on the Day of the Lord. Between bratwursts, enjoy $2 well, $1 PBR, and 50 cents off all beers. EJ
Tube
18 NW 3rd, 241-8823, Mon-Fri 5-8 pm
Yeah, sure, it looks like Zoolander inside, but when it comes to a vegetarian/vegan happy hour, there is no better deal. Five bucks will get you a frosty PBR and a gigantic (fake) pastrami on panini sandwich or the polenta provençal–delicate polenta cakes with sundried tomato pesto and tons of garlic. Throw in a half a dozen more meatless meals, and an insane selection of mixed drinks, and you finally have somewhere to go in between the horror of work and the disappointment of home. EAC
Virginia
Cafe
725 SW Park, 227-0033, 4-7 pm nightly, Thurs & Sat all day
Double your well or call drink for an extra $1.50 ($2.50 most premiums) plus beer and wine discounts everyday at the Virginia. Or, come on Thursday or Saturday for “buck day,” where you get $2 wells and $3 calls all the livelong day. MS
XV
15 SW 2nd, 790-9090, $2 off food, $1 off drinks, 4-7 pm nightly
Holy shit! The jerked squid at XV is so good I spend hours fantasizing about it. Slightly crispy on the edges and spiced to give your tongue a slow burn–if only your lover could be so skillful. They also offer tons of other great food, like catfish and pork tacos, but why wouldn’t you get the squid? Also of note: they pour healthy shots of Chartreuse, a mysterious liquor that will quickly become one of your faves. KS