Portland is pretty lame; practically shutting down at around 11 p.m. People are freakishly nice out here it's creepy. I can't say that I hate Portland, it's alright and I think it's like any average U.S. city, say Boise.

I've lived in a bunch of crappy cities and traveled to a few 3rd world or "developing" shit holes that makes Portland seem really enticing. But what's with all this keep it weird crap? What exactly is weird out here? That it's fashionable to look like an emo dirt merchant who just went dumpster diving? No, it's not weird, it's ordinary. Hipsters are banal, the bars are average and the Mexican food isn't bad. Every now and then cool stuff happens, but I can't remember what it was.

I generally dislike people, but I'm forced to discuss how my day is by some hokey cashier with a shit eating grin. Really? You wanna know how my day is going? How about fuck you it's going? I know, I'm miserable, but people simmer down and let's not get too excited that you're counting my change.

Portland is a hospitable city and I like not being woken up by gunfire or having to deal with dengue. I enjoy the laid back attitude, the surrounding wilderness and shit. To me Portland is like a big ass suburbia sprinkled with a few meth heads and random minorities. No one really stands out much and it's relatively quiet. Oh yeah, the drivers out here suck a donkey's dick.