I'm sure most didn't hear about this, but there were a few suicides over the past couple of weeks. The one that struck me the most was a man who threw himself off of the St. Johns Bridge. But before he did, he shot himself in the head. Apparently, this guy had been dealing with some pretty severe depression and I guess he just couldn't handle it anymore. You know, when I read that story, I imagined what his life was like with all the issues of the day, politics, the economy, the country...and none of that mattered to him. He was dealing with something deeper. I wonder if he had any friends? If he had kids? What made him finally give up and what led him to that bridge railing? There is something deeper within me that also comes before all the issues of the day. There is the lifelong loneliness that I feel, the sense of never having fit in and the deep sadness that has followed me all of my years. I'm getting too old to think that there can be any real change in my life, but I haven't given up yet. I guess there is still a little hope in me, fading as it may be. I will never know that man who threw himself off the bridge a couple of weeks ago, but I have thought about him quite a bit... because I think I can relate to him.
Get the best of the Mercury each week in your inbox!