There are a few things not invited back to this summer (fashion wise) and one of them is HATS. Look, there is absolutely NO REASON to wear a hat in Portland. It's never hot enough to warrant one, and when you signed up to join the rest of us here, you made a solemn vow to never cover your head with ANYTHING. Especially when it's raining.
Anyway, I'm really sick of people wearing those dumb Frank Sinatra hats, and as a general rule, you should never buy or wear anything that can be purchased at a kiosk in the Lloyd Center mall. Don't believe me? Here are some pictures of you wearing stupid hats, so you can see how stupid you look in them.

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Nice hat, stupid! (And for that leather jacket, you get extra stupid points.)

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Jesus Christ. Are ya stupid? I think you just may be!

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Fuck YOU, stupid!

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Actually, she looks pretty. Pretty fucking stupid!!

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Hey baby! You look stupid in your stupid fucking hat, stupid!