THURSDAY, JANUARY 28

SING SONG—Just when you thought the private karaoke rooms of Voicebox couldn't get any better, along come the fun wranglers of PDX Pop Now!, with tracks from some of their favorite Portland bands to add to the sing-along festivities. All tonight's proceeds go straight to making this summer's all-ages fest even more poppin', so sing out strong and long. CF

Voicebox, 2112 NW Hoyt, 6 pm, $8, all ages (6-9 pm only)

SWAYZE(ISH)—Tonight. Gerding Theater. Road House: The Play. I'm sorry, you need more information? Okay: As part of the Fertile Ground festival (which runs through Tuesday), a handful of local comedians including Live Wire! host Courtenay Hameister and the Liberators' Shelley McLendon took it upon themselves to stage an adaptation of the 1989 classic, which originally starred Patrick Swayze as a bouncer at a Missouri bar. AH

Gerding Theater at the Armory, 128 NW 11th, 9:30 pm, $10 (free with festival pass)

FRIDAY, JANUARY 29

DEVIL HORNS—Eugene doom metallers YOB return like a red tide, rising every so often to bathe us in crimson with roaring, destructive rock. Their rare shows descend on you like blunted, colossally heavy objects, so prepare to be pulverized. NL

w/Witch Mountain, Trees; Rotture, 315 SE 3rd, 9 pm, $10-13

CRIB SHEET—Months after Ignore the Ignorant made a splash across the pond, partially local band the Cribs are finally celebrating the record's release here in town. In addition to another lot of tightly wound pop songs, the album is their first with Johnny Marr on guitar. Yes, that Johnny Marr. Come get star struck with the rest of us. EAC

w/Jemina Pearl; Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell, 9 pm, $14-15, all ages

SATURDAY, JANUARY 30

CHEER UP—It's in the darkest patches of rain-soaked winter that we need All Girl Summer Fun Band the most. Their brand of frolicking fuzz-pop shakes off even the dampest of spirits. NL

w/ioa, Eternal Tapestry; Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi, 9 pm, $10, all ages

NEED FOR TWEED—How has Portland survived this long with so many steampunks, so many cyclists, and no tweed-themed bicycle ride? Slip on your knickers and top hat for the first annual Tweed Ride, but also pack your pocket with quarters for the Pinball Pedal later in the afternoon, which tours from bars to doughnut shops to flip your fingers on Portland's best machines. SM

Tweed Ride at Skidmore Fountain, SW 1st & Ankeny, 11 am; Pinball Pedal meets at Pedal Bike Tours, 2249 N Williams, 4 pm, 21+

SUNDAY, JANUARY 31

BIRTHDAY BALLROOM—Since you never visit Grandma anymore after dumping her in that scary nursing home, it looks like the Crystal Ballroom is the only elderly friend you have left. Celebrate their 96th year of dancing on air with this massive birthday spectacular that will stretch over all three floors. Unlike Grandma's birthday, this one won't cost you a dime. Sorry, Nana. EAC

w/Langhorne Slim, Mt. St. Helens Vietnam Band, the Maldives, & more; Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside, all day, FREE, all ages

100!—Holy smokes! After two years of promoting mostly local, always-free Sunday night shows at Rontoms, Distiller Promo (formerly SPECTRE) has reached the century mark. To celebrate making it to the triple digits, they are going all out with nine fine local acts, including the inspiring sing-alongs of Jared Mees & the Grown Children and literary folk of Nick Jaina. All night long, all for free. EAC

w/Dirty Mittens, Hosannas, Typhoon, & more; Rontoms, 600 E Burnside, 5 pm, FREE

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 1

DOUBLE FEATURE—Back before Gus Van Sant was all famous and revered, and back before Matt Dillon was... well, whatever Matt Dillon is now, 1989's Drugstore Cowboy put both of them—and Portland—on the map. Tonight it plays as part of Boxxes' weekly Late-Night Double Feature Picture Show, where it'll be preceded by (why not!) Eli Roth's gore-tastic 2002 horror flick Cabin Fever. EH

Boxxes, 1035 SW Stark, Cabin Fever at 8:30 pm, Drugstore Cowboy at 10:30 pm, FREE, 21+

FOURSOME—Kronos Quartet remain relevant as one of the top modern string quartets by managing to keep themselves aligned with maverick contemporary composers. Their performance is a fitting and welcome one for this cello-crazy town of ours. PAC

Reed College's Kaul Auditorium, 3203 SE Woodstock, 7:30 pm, $14-40

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 2

SAMPSELL—You read an excerpt of local author Kevin Sampsell's new autobiography A Common Pornography in this paper a few weeks ago. Tonight's your chance to hear Sampsell himself read from the book—he's even promised a PowerPoint presentation. AH

Powell's City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 7:30 pm, FREE

GET LOST—The final season of Lost premieres tonight, in a nail-biting, suspense-ridden, pants-crapping, two-hour episode (preceded by a one-hour clip show at 8 pm). Cort and Fatboy host a screening at the Bagdad. For free. There is nowhere you'd rather be. AR

Bagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne, 9 pm, FREE

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 3

DANCE—Bruno Beltrão/Grupo de Rua blend the Brazilian martial art of capoeira with a good dose of hiphop and a modern dance sensibility. White Bird presents more heart-stopping energy with this Uncaged performance than they'll likely have in the rest of their season. PAC

Bison Building, 419 NE 10th, 8 pm, $26, through Feb 7

WHITE OUT—If you have any doubts about attending this show, simply listen to White Hinterland's new single "Icarus" and let it calm your nerves. Their much-anticipated new record Kairos is out March 8; 'til then, head here for your proper dosage of local jams. RN

w/Camping Party, the Ro Sham Bos; Rotture, 315 SE 3rd, 9 pm, $5