More so than any other superhero (yes, even Aquaman), there is just something about Superman that inspires musicians to write song after song about him. From 50 Cent to Bryan Adams, Clark Kent’s secret identity has been the muse for hundreds of songs in just about every genre of music. So in honor of the new Superman flick coming out, we dive deep into the world of Superman songs and rank them according to the comic’s cast of characters.
“I Am Superman” performed by R.E.M.
While it’s not originally an R.E.M. song—it was issued by garage rockers the Clique in 1969—it’s their version from Life’s Rich Pageant that gave this song the attention it deserved. When it comes to Superman songs, this is the best of the bunch, a straightforward rock song that shows the power of the Superman mystique, plus has enough Clark Kent in it to relate to a line like, “You don’t really love that guy you make it with now do you?/I know you don’t love that guy ’cause I can see right through you.”
Superman Ranking: Bizarro Superman (because it’s bizarre that the song is actually good)
“Rapper’s Delight” by the Sugarhill Gang
Yeah, I know, it’s not really about Superman, but this song (one of hiphop’s first) does call out the Man of Steel for his poor choice in outfits. “Just let me quit my boyfriend called Superman/I said he’s a fairy I do suppose/flyin’ through the air in pantyhose/he may be very sexy or even cute/but he looks like a sucker in a blue and red suit.”
Superman Ranking: General Zod
“Superman (It’s Not Easy)” by Five for Fighting
Oh god, this limp mound of lite-FM modern rock is the Dean Cain of Superman songs. Totally unnecessary and unlikeable. It’s so all-around terrible that it can ruin both music and comics for anyone brave enough to listen. Musical kryptonite, beware!
Superman Ranking: Supergirl
“Sunshine Superman” by Donovan
Not only was it one of the first openly psychedelic-pop songs to garner attention, but “Sunshine Superman” is actually listenable and enjoyable, something I can’t say for most of the songs on this list. Plus, bonus points for lyrics that name-drop the Green Lantern. Then again, Donovan influenced Devendra Banhart; Superman would not be cool with that guy at all.
Superman Ranking: Mr. Mxyzptlk
“Jimmy Olsen’s Blues” by the Spin Doctors
Of course, you cannot think of the caped hero without thinking of this inconsequential alternative band that somehow churned up a couple mega ’90s hits. This opening song, from their Pocket Full of Kryptonite album (which sold a jaw-dropping 5 million-plus copies, all of which are now available used for $1.99), is just as bland as their singles, but at least it gives some mention to little Jimmy Olsen—the redheaded third wheel in the Clark Kent/Lois Lane love affair. “No, you don’t need no Superman/come on downtown and stay with me tonight/I, I got a pocket full of Kryptonite.” Killing the world’s greatest superhero for an evening of action with a coworker, has ever a song been so noble?
Superman Ranking: Jimmy Olsen