OMG, guys! IT’S LIKE A PSYCHO WARD OUT THERE! For those who wisely have steered clear of Bieber mania, JB fans are losing their freaking minds about his Grammy loss to Esperanza Spalding. Look, I’m doing everything I can to calm people down—including writing this post—but it’s like the streets of Egypt a week and a half ago, and I’m like an even more handsome Anderson Cooper getting my ass handed to me! For the love of god, SEND REINFORCEMENTS!! (Also, somebody tell this kid to stick a sugar titty in his mouth, and get a goddamn grip.)


via

https://youtube.com/watch?v=9QHAqAnevHg

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

5 replies on “Nice Work, Esperanza! You Ruined this Kid’s “Teenager.””

  3. You’re trying to calm them down? You should be trying to whip them up! You’re no Bieber Belieber, you’re nothing but a Bieber Deceieber!

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