IMG_8144.JPG

I was psyched last week to spend a morning with Stephanie Pierce, the founder, leader, and chief Commodore 64 operator of Portland’s 24-hour Church of Elvis (read the whole profile here). The Church of Elvis coin-operated art gallery has been a legend in Portland since it opened nearly 25 years ago, but Pierce is always tweaking the machinery and is currently launching a bold, new plan: real weddings.

For $25, Pierce will legally marry you and the spouse of your choice outside the coin-op gallery on NW Couch. But the steal-of-a-deal is the $2 non-legal wedding you can buy straight from the machine (the wiring is supposed to be worked out this week, at least). Here’s what you get for a measly eight quarters:
• Two neon rings
• Tiny bag of rice
• Pinky-size condom
• Photo of your wedding (not real photo)
• Photo of your wedding night (not real photo)
• Photo of the father of the bride (who resembles Rip Torn)
• Levi and Bristol’s Handy Divorce Kit
• One Church of Elvis dollar
• Two wedding announcements
• One sticker

So, thrifty lovebirds, make your way to NW 5th and Couch.

Sarah Shay Mirk reported on transportation, sex and gender issues, and politics at the Mercury from 2008-2013. They have gone on to make many things, including countless comics and several books.

3 replies on “Here’s What You Get With a $2 Church of Elvis Wedding”

  1. We got married years (12) ago at the previous spot and Elvis himself (or a close proximity) ‘blessed’ the ceremony. Greatest second date ever.

  2. When I got my non-legal wedding 16 years ago, she suddenly came outside after the computer was done talking to us and handed us a giant celebratory scrap banner that we ran to the corner and back, cans loudly rattling, proclaiming that we had just gotten married at the 24CoE. Did I get an Elvis/Priscilla in my kit instead of a Levi/Bristol?

Comments are closed.