Watch out, idiots, he is going to fuck you up
Andrew Wright
The New Ben-Hur: Same Chariot Race, Way More Jesus!
The new remake tightens up the bloat of the 1959 classic, but to no avail.
Tonight, the Great Michael Ironside Comes to Portland
Dear lord, that voice. Any proper appreciation of Michael Ironside should begin with that voice, which fashions an entire Home Depotโs worth of gravel into something iconic and shivery, on-camera or off. (If DC doesnโt get him to reprise his animated role as Darkseid for live action, theyโll be making, well, yet another huge mistake.) […]
An Appreciation of Michael Ironside (and Scanners)
Ironside approaches!
Lights Out: TURN THE LIGHTS BACK ON! TURN THE LIGHTS BACK ONNNN!
YouTube is bursting at the seams with horror shorts, the vast majority of which traffic in the same old jump scares and photoshopped demon faces. David F. Sandbergโs Lights Out, however, managed to distinguish itself from the lurching masses, brilliantly capitalizing on its limitations to present one indelibly shivery concept: namely, a silhouette that creeps […]
Lights Out Offers a Steady Array of Oh-Shit Moments
TURN THE LIGHTS BACK ON! TURN THE LIGHTS BACK ONNNN!
The Infiltrator Review: Now That’s Some Grade-A Cranston!
It may be impossible to completely screw up an undercover cop movie, with the very nature of the premise guaranteeing some vicarious hopscotching over the morality line. Judged on plot alone, The Infiltrator is a solid, mid-level walk on the seedy side, with enough based-on-fact dirty business to hold the interest. When you factor in […]
The Infiltrator: Cocaine. Mustaches. Bryan Cranston.
The Infiltrator: Cocaine. Mustaches. Bryan Cranston.
Can You Talk Like Jeff Goldblum? Spoiler: No
Jeff Goldblum is a friend to all creatures. The problem with writing about Jeff Goldblum’s speech patterns is that the things that make them so distinctiveโthe spoken italics, the stutter-step changes in pitch, the sense that he’s parodying his own line readings, sometimes in the middle of said lineโare almost impossible to replicate in print. […]
How to Talk Like Jeff Goldblum
Can you talk like Jeff Goldblum? Spoiler: No.
The Conjuring 2: Watch Out, Colon!
For horror fans accustomed to wandering through acres of dreck for a meager jolt, James Wan is the real deal. The Conjuring 2, the director’s return to the horror game after the amiably knuckleheaded Furious 7, is a brilliantly staged, strangely exhausting work of a filmmaker in complete thrall to his chosen genre. This is […]
The Conjuring 2 (Much of a Good Thing)
James Wan returns to horror. Try not to jump.
