Dan Savage

Bug Chasers I went on to the Drudge Report today and read this: “MAG: 25% OF NEW HIV-INFECTED GAY MEN SOUGHT OUT VIRUS, SAYS SAN FRAN HEALTH OFFICIAL.” Is there any truth to this? I sincerely hope that it’s not true and that Matt Drudge’s “journalist” badge is revoked! Can’t Trust Drudge Sorry, CTD, but […]

Blue Movies I really need some insight from someone I don’t have to look in the face! I’m a young actor who is trying to get some info on the behind-the-scenes etiquette of filming a sex scene. (Cable-series sex, not adult-movie sex.) I’ve done theater and some extra work in film, but up to now […]

Usually, I love your open, honest, thoughtful advice, but what you said to Momma Violates Poppa, the sexually frustrated pregnant woman whose husband won’t sleep with her, was as cruel as what her husband’s doing to her. Yes, it’s possible that her husband’s just plain not turned on. But no sex with the love of […]

Bad Tranny I am a single parent with a wonderful 15-year-old son. My son’s father, my ex, is a gay man. We’ve accepted this and we love him dearly, but there are issues affecting my son that my ex is ignoring. My ex has also been diagnosed with HIV. This was heartbreaking news for all […]

I was watching Dr. Phil on television the other day with my wife. He was talking to a woman who discovered, after marrying her husband, that he was a crossdresser, or at least had crossdressing tendencies. Dr. Phil counseled the woman to leave the man because of his “perversion,” and told her that no one […]

A few weeks back I invited readers to share their most horrifying true stories of desperate and/or depressing holiday sex. As promised, the author of the best horrifying true story of holiday sex–as determined by me and me alone–wins a $75 Toys in Babeland gift certificate. See if you can spot the winner before you […]

I am a 22-year-old virgin going to college in Texas. I have never had a girlfriend (I’m from a stupid foreign culture, my mom doesn’t allow dating, etc.), and will wind up in an arranged marriage in two years. What point is there for me to get in a relationship when I’m destined for an […]

[Savage is on vacation this week. Here is “Classic Savage Love,” a column that originally ran in June of 1957, the year he won his first Pulitzer Prize–Eds.] I’m a man in my mid-30s, and I just started dating after the end of a five-year relationship. The last three dates I’ve had have been with […]

A coworker and I share a huge amount of sexual energy. The primary issue is that he’s 17 and I’m closer to 30. My attraction to him is likely related to a (mild) distrust of men, an issue I’m working through with a therapist. I’m not interested in a relationship, and I’m sure that, at […]

I wanted to respond to the advice you gave to Tried Not to Fall, the closeted gay guy who was in love with his straight roommate. You advised TNTF to tell his straight roommate how he felt.I am in the straight roommate’s shoes, Dan. I believe my roommate is gay and, judging by the many […]

I’m a successful guy with a beautiful wife who is a successful executive herself. About two years ago I had a seriously stupid affair with an attractive woman at my firm. It lasted six weeks, and then my wife busted us. She did the usual and threw my sorry ass out of the house; I […]