From (where else?) the New York Post:

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A raging cyclist fed up with aggressive Manhattan drivers took matters into his own hands yesterday, jumping on the hood of a limo that clipped him and smashing in the windshield with his fists.

Bike messenger-gone-wild Perzeus Forte, 20, also ripped out the front passenger window, tore the shirt of driver Darr Mohammed, 49, and clocked him in the face…

“He hit me and kept going,” Forte later fumed to The Post. “I’m sick of this.”

Forte’s rampage began while riding his bike up Sixth Avenue in Chelsea, where Mohammed grazed him around West 19th Street. The limo kept going until he got stopped by a red light at West 20th Street.

That’s when Forte flipped out, ditching his wheels and sprinting 100 yards to the car. He leaped onto the hood while screaming, “I’m going to kill you! I’m going to kill you, motherf- – -er!” according to one witness.

The belligerent biker then jumped off the hood and grabbed the half-open driver’s-side window, shaking it back and forth until it shattered, the witness said.

Forte allegedly socked Mohammed in his left eye and ripped the breast pocket of his blue dress shirt. Mohammed, who lives in Bayonne with his wife and daughter, suffered a black eye.

He then turned his attention to his blood-soaked hands, plucking out shards of glass while waiting for the cops.

Dear car drivers of Portland: I promise I will never do this.

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

17 replies on “This is How They Do Bike Rampages in NYC”

  1. Perzeus Forte!

    Now you must track down video footage and post it with Yakity Yak music-like that “Dog destroys cop bumper” video

  2. Well, NYC drivers are sort of in a different league than Portland drivers. This dudes reaction is overkill in NY, it would certainly be overkill here. so yeah, dont do that.

  3. I am not in support of this, but if drivers felt that they were in danger when they endangered cyclists maybe they would give a little more space. That safety cage leads people to do all kinds of nascar like crap.

  4. This guy deserves a reward.*

    *Disclaimer – The opinions of Jackattak are in no way, shape, or form the opinions of the greater cycling community of Portland, OR. Jackattak doesn’t even own a bicycle. Thank you.

  7. Here’s me advocating violence again (after I got so upset at Matt Davis for encouraging rioters!) but holy gosh, when I had a motorcycle, I was hit twice by drivers who knocked me flat and just kept going. If I had been able to catch either one, I would have (tried) to do worse than give them a black eye!

    Sure, a motorcycle or bike is a stupid thing to be riding around in traffic – but I’m still a person! If you squash me at least offer to call me an ambulance or something…

  9. The Post is hilarious. I love their typical baited photograph that goes along with the story. They’ll scream “WHY’D YOU DO IT” and start snapping over and over and over until they get the best possible angry look.

  12. I got hit by a car one time when a driver ran a red light. After I picked myself up off the ground, I threw my bike at the car’s windshield. I didn’t shatter it, but, I cracked it real nice. In spite of the fact that this action probably drastically reduced the insurance settlement I got, it is still one of my proudest moments. (Not that you should ever do this if you get hit by a car. Seriously, just lay on the ground. You will get more money.)

  13. I’m a pedestrian, typically. I have put my foot into many a Benz or Bimmer’s door in the past two years of living Downtown for blowing crosswalks.*

    *Disclaimer: The above comment made my Jackattak has nothing to do with hatred or prejudice towards the fine products of Mercedes-Benz, GmbH or Bavarian Motorwerks. It just so happens that the Amerikaner that drive their fine products suck balls at driving.

  14. “I’m a pedestrian, typically. I have put my foot into many a Benz or Bimmer’s door in the past two years of living Downtown for blowing crosswalks.”

    that’s beautiful…I’ve only mockingly done it but I think I’ll go ahead and make contact next time, knock the cellphone outta their hands!

  15. I was hit by a car in Portland once, called the cops, waited an hour no one showed, called again the next morning was given the run around, several more calls, and they said well you weren’t hurt so even though the guy hit you on purpose, then got out of his car and yelled at you that you should not have been riding in the street even though you were doing so legally there is no crime.

    If the cops won’t take it seriously then maybe some folks have to take it into their own hands.

  17. Perzeus looks really, really pissed off. Thing about where this happened in midtown (I know it well) traffic is soo heavy and stop and go, folks engaging in rage won’t have a clean getaway, so everybody better be able to back up their words and hand language.

    Perzeus is lucky he encountered a passive limo driver. It could have ended with him being shot, stabbed, whatever.

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