As mentioned earlier, the World Naked Bike Ride is coming this Saturday. I want to start a competing ride entitled “THE PORKY PIG RIDE” in which participants are completely naked, except for a coat and bow tie. White gloves are optional. WHO’S WITH ME??

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Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

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