Because they simply can’t stop themselves from being awful, Under Armour—the Trump-supporting sports apparel company that dresses out-of-shape dads like idiots—is being awful again… this time to a small Oregon company. According to Source Weekly, a start-up clothing store in Bend, Oregon named Cascade Armory has received a cease and desist order from the gigantic corporation claiming that the tiny store’s brand could cause confusion to the billions of dads and bro-dudes who wear Under Armour’s ass-ugly athletic gear.
As you can see from the above picture, the logos of both companies share almost no similarities—other than the word “armor” which UA seems to have trouble spelling. As for the clothing itself, here’s a side-by-side example of what each company typically sells. As you can see, other than both having arm and neck holes, the vibes are very different.
In the cease and desist order, Under Armour demanded that Cascade Armory abandon with prejudice its application for trademark and any other applications and registrations for marks comprised of or containing the term armory, armoury, armor, armour or any misspellings or variations thereof. The company demanded Cascade Armory permanently quit using, registering or applying to register the Cascade Armory mark and any versions containing the same versions of ‘armory’ or ‘armor.’ Also, they demanded that Cascade Armory deactivate its website and social media pages that contain the same words.
This isn’t Under Armour’s first foray into attempting to strangle the world’s use of the word “armor”: In the past few years they have filed several copyright infringement cases against such brands as BodyArmor (which sells nutritional drinks), Ass Armor (protective snowboarding shorts), Armor & Glory (Christian clothing), and even Salt Armour (salt water fishing apparel).
Under Armour often finds themselves falling face first into controversy in other areas as well, including being an early and vocal supporter of Donald Trump, financially supporting bear murderers, and producing cheap, doofus shirts that are seemingly more susceptible than other clothing to injuries from fire.
While the owners of Cascade Armory, Alex and Diana Short, have no intention of kowtowing to Under Armour’s bullying tactics, they also admit that a legal fight against the conglomerate would put their young business in peril. So if you’d like to support a small Oregon business, check out Cascade Armory here. And if you’d like to support a company who doesn’t care if you look like a moron… well, here you go.
Thanks Merc. Armour does not equal Armory. Being unacceptably bad does not suport Oregon small business. Maybe Armour needs ongoing Merc scrutiny?
Of all of our fitness apparel overlords in the Pacific Northwest (including the one with the sweatshops, the one that broke college basketball, and the one that left its empty nest in the suburbs to come here and hate the homeless), Under Armor seems to want that “worst” title more than the others.
Cascade Armory — get some hats with better style bills.
Yours look like MAGA hats without the Trump.
And UnderArmsour (the Pits?!), get a fucking Life.
You don’t actually own English — even if you can’t quite Spell.
Thanks!
Well, Starbucks won its suit against Sam Buck’s Coffeeshop in Astoria, and somehow the IOCC won its idiotic suit against Olympic Provisions (despite the hundreds of other businesses in the Puget Sound region that use the term “Olympics”), so why the hell would things start making sense now?
I was interested in this story and in supporting this small biz until I saw their disgusting “Armed and Honored CAtech tshirt” featuring a grimacing human skull in a Plains Indian warbonnet/headdress. What kind of message is that sending? Not a cute look.