A record breaking crowd showed up for the match!
A record breaking crowd showed up for the match! Photo courtesy of Portland Thorns FC

The Portland Thorns PUMPED UP THE HUMP DAY with a 5-0 win over the Houston Dash on Wednesday night at Providence Park! FAN KICKS AND BABY CHICKS! IT WAS A BANGER OF A MATCH!

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A whooping, and record-breaking, 22,329 fans witnessed the most wonderful summer ass-kicking of the season. The weather was perfect and we finally got to give our 2019 Women’s World Cup Champions that hero’s welcome! The stage was set for a great night and The Thorns delivered some hot delicious goal-scoring action!


The first half started quick! Kick after kick landed in Portland’s favor. The ladies in red looked organized and energized early on. It only took seven minutes for the Thorns to get on the board with World Cup Champ, Lindsey Horan ringing in the midweek with a goal!

Then, in the 12th minute Portland’s Hayley Raso was left unmarked in the back corner of the goal and directed a cross from Tobin Heath right where the ball belongs—THE BACK OF THE NET!

Boy oh boy! We are only 20 minutes into the match and the Thorns just can't get enough! Midfielder Midge Purce made a mad dash for the goal and ended up on the wrong end of a nasty tackle. OUCHY MAMA! She went down and the referee whistled for a Penalty Kick. That’s when Thorns Captain, Christine Sinclair, stepped up and brought that third goal to fruition. THREE GOALS BEYOND!


The Thorns weren't 30 minutes into the match when Raso knocked her second one back after a honey of a scootch from Midge Purce. WHEN WILL THEY LEARN NOT TO TURN THEIR BACKS ON RASO! (NEVER I HOPE)

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After the first 45 minutes, the Thorns had taken a total of 14 shots and the Dash only 3. Portland was dominating in passing, shooting, and GOALS GOALS GOALS. The only thing Houston was leading in was substitutions in the first half. They subbed two players in the first 30 minutes. H-Town was looking as unorganized as my sock drawer and there was lots of soccer left to be played!

Meghan Klingenberg has been a critical defender and crucial connector agani this season.
Meghan Klingenberg has been a critical defender and crucial connector agani this season. Photo courtesy of Portland Thorns FC


The second half didn’t produce as many goals for the Thorns, but boy oh boy were there opportunities! The last and final goal of the match was masterfully created by Tyler Lussi. She hunted, chased and fought for the ball down the field. Lussi found the Thorns a penalty kick opportunity. Heath took the kick, chaos was created and the Thorns score again!


What a night! What a night! What a beautiful night! The Thorns are currently seated at the top of the NWSL table with 26 points, all of our World Cup Champions are back and all is seemingly right in the world. If the summer 2019 has a best of playlist, this game is going to kick that cd off.

Please join me Saturday, August 3 for the next Thorns home match. If you can’t make it, follow my live twitter feed at @PortlandMercury and follow me @erinjeanius.
Go Thorns!

So happy to have the whole band back together!
So happy to have the whole band back together! Photo courtesy of Portland Thorns FC

Migration Brewing Rooftop at Canvas Now Open!
This 9th floor patio boasts stunning views of the city, three mountains, and Portland’s West Hills.