Ringside Steakhouse 2165 W Burnside Walking into the Ringside bar is like walking into an episode of The Man Show. Thick-necked men in suits sip tumblers of bourbon. Boxing gloves dangle from the ceiling, sports hero autographs hang from the wall alongside comments like, ‘I loved the steak.’ There is a plethora of dark wood, […]
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Beirut Now Portland
Abu Rasheed’s Tasty Lebanese Cuisine
Abu Rasheed 1921 SW 6th Ave (between Hall St and College St) 274-4412 Lucky for us some of the tastiest cuisine of the Arab world, the Lebanese, is now firmly rooted in the Rose City. Supposedly, the Portland area is quite similar in climate and topography to that of Lebanon (they even have a cedar […]
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SELF-HELL
Analysis for People on the Go
Am I America? Many folks here at The Helsinki Institute (located in downtown Madison, Wisconsin) have been talking about President Bush’s economic forum. (We have a lot of time to watch CNN while waiting for lab results.) This has led to some confusion. “We’re America,” the president told a group of 240 carefully chosen, mainly […]
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FOOD ISSUE
FOOD, BY PEOPLE WHO KNOW FOOD
Even though the Mercury is chock-full of big brains and hungry stomachs, we were just plain too hungover this week to do this food issue ourselves. So instead, we asked none other than… yes, you guessed it, the experts. Literally swarming around Portland, these experts come in all shapes and sizes, education levels, and economic […]
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THE AARON PLAN
I’m Fat, and That’s That—Or is it?
It’s hot. It’s damn hot. It’s hotter than a half-fucked fox in a forest fire, and I’m way too fat for it. You see, for the last couple years, my combination of diet and “exercise” has lead to a combination of my waist and inflated fat cells. And if you’ve ever seen fat cells on […]
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THE EXPERT’S GUIDE TO AREA GROCERIES
Had enough of Velveeta and Iceberg lettuce? Leave your Safeway Club Card at home, and head out to any of the hundreds of specialty markets in town. Don’t know where to find bible tripe? Ask the expert!
Where to shop if you’re RICH: Many of Portland’s well-heeled have never seen the place, but their maids and personal chefs are well acquainted with the luxury-packed aisles of Strohecker’s, 2855 SW Patton. Typical of the old money folks, who care not for fancy décor and the latest trendy products, Strohecker’s is about as elegantly […]
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Pass the Nutcreem
A Decadent, Vegan Sugar Freakout
While I am not a vegan, I will only consume vegan dessert products. Part of this is due to the influence of my meat-eating boyfriend, whose neuroses are such that any fat-filled/processed sugar dessert sends him into a state of frenzy. This attitude, as you might imagine, is quite contagious. Another reason I only consume […]
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Don’t Fear the Germans
Berlin Inn Serves More than Grease and Gravy
The Berlin Inn 3131 SE 12th Ave (at Powell Blvd.) 236-6761 Most sane Americans have gotten over WWII-era paranoia. My Uncle Myron, however, won’t go near a German restaurant; I think he’s convinced that a submarine will appear in the parking lot and launch a torpedo at his Oldsmobile. But most Amer-icans’ prejudice against German […]
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La Parilla: My New Favorite
Loved by Mexican Snobs Everywhere
La Parilla 5832 NE Glisan 236-5575 I was recently at the Goodfoot with a friend of mine, when this random stoner /surfer dude attempted to impress us with his Mexican food knowledge. He combatively boasted that San Diego was a much better place for Mexican food and that he knew a lot more about it […]
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Self-Hell
Analysis for People on the Go
Am I Having a Bad Day? Ever have a day when you wish you hadn’t been born? Of course you have! Everyone has dark days, even celebrities! Even George Hamilton has woken up wishing someone would just cleave him in two with a long sword. Yet despite their ubiquity, many people are loathe to admit […]
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Gold Garden is Fantastic
Only, It’s on 82nd Ave
Gold Garden Seafood Restaurant 3016 SE 82nd Avenue 777-3399 Gold Garden, on 82nd Avenue, shares a parking lot with an unsightly motel. The neighboring bar, the Gold Coin Lounge, is home to grumbling old alcoholics, and the dining area overlooks Budget Used Car Lots. How typically 82nd Avenue, then, that some of the best Chinese […]
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Say Hello to PDX-Mex
Think it Sounds Weird? It is.
El Zaguan 1338 NW Hoyt 222-0742 Portland’s Mexican food scene runs the gamut, from seedy little taquerias to the precious and pricey Café Azul. But recently, several upstarts have come along to challenge the yucky chains and the crunchy/healthy places for the mid-priced market. Taqueria Nueve, on NE 28th, has succeeded at raising the bar […]