Alright Blogtowners, I need your help. I’m scheduled to interview the Trailer Park Boys tomorrow morning. Normally, not a problem. But here’s the rub: the three of them—Ricky, Julian and Bubbles—are going to do the thing in character. As such, I don’t what the fuck to ask ’em. I don’t want this turning into some shit-tornado. Help me out.
UPDATE:
Y’all are killing it. Keep it up and I’ll turn the whole damn interview into reader questions. You’ve got until 10:30AM Thursday to get yours in. (Oh, and if you’re wondering if I’ve ever seen the show you surely missed the shit-tornado reference. In your face, cinnamon cocks!)
What is the best way to get two birds stoned at once?
will you be physically colocated with them, or on the phone? Are they in town for something?
Ask them about conky, ask them about their favorite lahey moments, ask them if they miss jail, if they miss corey and trevor.
I would like to know if Ricky can give me advice on the fastest possible way to get drunk as fuck.
I would like to know if Bubbles has ever contemplated coming up with his own exotic breed of cat. Like an exotic shorthair mixed with a bobcat.
I would like to know if Julian is ever going back to jail.
a.tonry, had you ever heard of the trailer park boys before you got this awesome assignment? you have some work to do. start with season 3
ok here you go
for julian:
1. how many rum and cokes do you drink a day
2. any tips for installing a rum and coke dispensary in a car? what kinds of design changes did you make after your first?
3. how do you feel about conky?
for ricky
1. nice shirt. where did you get it?
2. where are you living now?
3. what kind of car are you driving?
4. i understand you like the park, but mr lahey and bobandy are jerks, why don’t you guys just move to another park?
5. how’s your daughter doing in school?
6. how are things with your wife/girlfriend? still on the rocks? is this a touchy subject? are you two getting touchy?
7. do you have a recommendation for grow lamps? would you be open to teaching a class at one of the hydroponic supply stores while you are here in portland? (A.tonry-give him a list of shops and telephone ###S)
for bubbles
1. what’s favorite rush lyric?
2. what’s the chord progression for “liquor and whores”?
3. rent is cheap in portland and there are lots of bands, since you have some street credibility, consider a move to start something new?
4. portland used to have an underground wresting league, if it started up again is there any possibility the green bastard would make a cameo?
5. does conky ever come around?
miguelaron, julian didn’t build the rum+coke dispenser, the boys did while he was in jail.
The who what now?
What does Bubbs think of those new plastic carts at Fred Meyer?
Do Cory and Trevor ever get to go on tour? What about Steve French?
Is there work for Alison at the Kittyland Love Center?
Did Sam Loscoe get his own caveman exhibit at the Smithsonian?
I also second @truthypup’s question, is it in person or via some sort of electronic communication method? (I’m guessing it is not in person since they won’t be here for another couple of weeks.)
Questions:
– You have any musical tastes we might not be aware of? Like maybe a Slint album mixed in with the Rush and April Wine?
– What is your favorite combination of nouns mixed with curse words?
– Do you still see Alex Lifeson much these days?
Bubbles:
– Henry Rollins lived in a shed and you live in a shed. Do you feel any sort of connection with him?
Truthypup-u right
Still, any necessary design changes? Is the rum and coke premixed?
eeee! I love the trailer park boys!
For Bubbs:
What do you look for in a shopping cart?
Are you considering bringing a U-haul for the tour to load up on carts and cats?
How is the Kittyland Love Center?
How do you feel about the many sightings of Sam-squanch in the Pacific NW? Are you worried?
For Julian:
How do you feel about Lahey and Randy’s attraction to you?
For Ricky:
Has your Grade 10 served you well? Would you consider going back to school for more education?
Have the raccoons (ray-kins) been after you?
Yea, ask them a bunch of stuff about Corey and Trevor. Apparently they were unceremoniously dismissed from the show by the producers.
Also, my cat keeps howling in the middle of the night. Shit keeps me up. How would Bubbles handle this? Does he recommend a good kitty sedative?
Also, were they every secretly turned on by Randy’s shirtless, husky physique?
Trailer Park Boys ranks up there with five-pin bowling, the CPR mannequin, and the paint roller as Great Exports From Canada We’ve Come To Adore. All magical, all indispensible to life as we know it. O Canada! You rock!
I’m worried, Andrew. Do you even *speak* Canadian?
For all the boys: It’s a well known fact that Randy & Lahey are touring Canada all the time, but haven’t dared to tour the States. Is there some legal agreement you have keeping them from us, or is it more of a gentlemen’s agreement? Whichever it is, why don’t you all come together and bring us the total package. And by package I don’t mean a penis. Just the lot of you.
Lived in Canada for two years and never gotten around to watching anything by them, still. Just seems boring.
1. Since it doesn’t take rocket appliances to get your grade ’10, what about grade 11?
2. Can you guys describe your favorite Patrick Swayze moment?
3. What’s the quickest way to tell male & female plants apart, in the world of hydroponics?
4. Ever shop at Fleet Farm?
5. Why did Lucy’s tit seem to grow then disappear during the show?
6. How much can I get for a good BBQ at the flea market? I’m looking to branch out.
7. Is it a real cheese burger with American sliced cheese, or is there some weird Canadian cheese you’re not telling us about? (Like Canadian milk in a bag?)
8. Have you ever gone as far as to…?
9. At his peak drinking, how many liters of alcohol did Lahey take in? And what number liver is he on?
10. Will Conky ever release a comedy album?
Is Randy more attractive in drag or as a man?
How do you make Swish?
(for Bubbles) How do you get around the automatic braking systems that some shopping carts have?
This is bewildering. I am bewildered now.
As CC states, yes, if you haven’t seen the show, this might be one of the most confusing Blogtown comment threads ever.
I got into the show in 2005, a freelance client in Toronto had sent me the Season 1 DVD as a housewarming present. I played episode 4 for anyone visiting the house. The part with Ricky grabbing the sound guy’s boom mike still brings me to tears.
What is the film crew actually like? Do they have any quirks or bad habits? Do they have a few drinks after the shooting is done for the day? Do they ever cut you some slack and not film something?
For Bubbles: New Seasons Market, a local grocery store in Portland, is offering pedestrian customers at its newest location (Hawthorne) the option to borrow a wagon or ‘Eco-Cart’ to help transport groceries home from the store.
What, if any, experience do you have with Eco-Carts? And, do you see this new mode of grocery transportation as a threat to the traditional shopping cart model?
If you were to carpet Canada, how long would it take to vacuum?
@a.tonry
just because you make a reference to 2 combinations of words from the TPB legacy doesnt mean you’ve ever seen the show. any moran with the internob knows where the wikipedia material is located
Are you bummed that Sebastian Bach just got busted for pot last night?