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Ask her about bikes! BIKES BIKES BIKES!
(Did I miss her final goodbye post? Really wanted one last chance to yell “BIKES!” at her.)
For fuck’s sake, I literally came here to yell “bikes.”
For Timber Joey:
“As I was going to St Ives,
I met a man with seven wives.
Every wife had seven sacks,
Every sack had seven cats,
Every cat had seven kits.
Kits, cats, sacks, wives.
How many were going to St Ives?”
For Sarah Mirk:
“What was the greatest thing BEFORE sliced bread?”
Ask Sarah Mirk if she feels bad that, according to a recent Mercury reader survery, Nick Allard is more likely to get a blowjob than she is.
For Timber Joey: “What do you hate most about your awesome job?”
Timber Joey has some humorous stories of drinking with USWNTers such as Abby Wambach when the ladies’ team were in town a few years ago. I’m not sure how you should ask this question, but you should find a way to get him to talk about it.
Wait, you’re NOT going to ask the sarcastic questions? That hardly seems fair. Or fun.
I once believe I saw Sarah jogging down a crowded sidewalk near my workplace talking to someone on a bluetooth device while doing so. Umm, that’s kind of douchey. You could ask her about that.
Ask Sarah what she’ll miss most about working at the Merc. If she says anything other than watching hours and hours of HUMP! submissions, you know she’s lying.
Then ask her what she will absolutely NOT miss about working at the Merc.