Well, the word just came down from the HR department that I’ve once again violated some stupid rule in the employee handbook, and now I’m forced to show all my underlings the following video. EMPLOYEES: I think when the creepy puppets in this clip advise you to “tell someone” when a manager slaps or spanks you, they’re only speaking metaphorically. BECAUSE IF YOU ASK ME, IT IS NOT A GOOD IDEA TO TELL SOMEONE. That is unless you want more of the same. Get it? Got it? Good. Enjoy the video. I’m watching you.
Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.) More by Wm. Steven Humphrey
WSH, I presume that beatings will continue until morale improves.