DC Comics Credit: Picture somewhat related, totally depressing
Picture somewhat related, totally depressing
  • DC Comics
  • Picture somewhat related, totally depressing

Things we supposedly know about this new console: It will have HD-quality graphics, debut at this year’s E3 and hit stores at some point next year.

Things we don’t know about this new console: Everything else.

I’m not going to start tossing out wild guesses on what stupid new gimmick Nintendo is going to build into this system to entice the elderly to throw things at their HDTVs, but I do want to offer up a short prayer to the god I don’t believe in that someone murders whichever jackass keeps greenlighting the “Friend Code” idea.

I understand the rationale behind the concept, but does Nintendo have any idea how difficult they’ve made it for teen boys to call each other “fags” over the Internet?

7 replies on “New Nintendo Console Coming In 2012”

  3. It is Quitely. It’s from “We3”. I haven’t read it but it looks fun.

    Also: about goddamn time, Nintendo, HD is only a gazillion years old. If this one comes with non-gimmicky controllers, I might consider buying it.

  4. We3 is definitely not “Fun.” It is, of all things, a goddamned tear-jerker. Probably the best thing both Grant Morrison and Frank Quitely have ever done.

    re: the “gimmick” convo – their gimmick just slaughtered all competition, and has led to Microsoft sinking cash into their own similar gimmick (that is ridiculously successful in its own right) and Sony claiming their version of that same gimmick is the best implemented version available.

    “Motion Controls” is about as gimmicky as D-pad was when it was invented, or as gimmicky as Rumble Pak/Dual Shock was when it was invented.

    The biggest problem with motion controls is the developers being lazy fucks about implementing them well.

  6. @Fatboy Roberts You hit the nail on the head. Nintendo has a lot of problems. The motion controls on the Wii are not one of them.

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