Ah, the thrill of royalty! But a thrill not experienced very often in this day and age. However! The Mercury is changing all that by presenting our Homecoming Dance on Friday, October 5th, at Conan’s Pub, on 39th and Hawthorne. And what would a homecoming dance be without a King and Queen? A big handful of CRAP, that’s what!

For the past three weeks, we’ve been taking nominations for Portland’s Homecoming
King and Queen, and have narrowed the pack down to six lucky contestants. Now,
it’s up to you, Portland, to make the final decision! Email us at lovenotes@portlandmercury.com,
choosing both a King and Queen from the choices listed below by Thursday,
October 4th. Then join us on October 5th at Conan’s to help us crown the
winners! It’s so exciting, you’ll pee your royal pantaloons!

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)