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GOOD AFTERNOON, PORTLAND! Hey, lookit this weather! Bright, sunny, and breezy alllll week long with highs around 50. (And hovering just above freezing at night.) Now let's hop into a bit of not-quite-breezy NEWS.


• Don't miss this humdinger of a story from OPB, about how thousands of text messages during Mayor Wheeler's tenure were erased in violation of city policy. The administration is trying to excuse the action by claiming Wheeler lacked the technical savvy needed to correctly follow the policy... if that's a thing you'd like to choose to believe.


• Hold up there, Sparky! There are STILL decisions to be made about the charter reform we just voted in favor of last week, and here's some of the topics that YOU will get to offer your opinion on in what's being called "phase 2" of the process: Climate and environmental justice, expansion of voting rights, and amendments proposed by city bureaus and offices. Our Isabella Garcia has a really good explainer!

• Thanks to lots of pushing from Oregon attorneys, Google is going to have to fork over $392 million to settle lawsuits from 40 states that accused the corporation of continuing to track users locations—even after saying they weren't.

• If you are thinking of buying a house anywhere in Northwest Portland, you're gonna need a bigger bank—because your annual income would need to be around $212,041 (!!) to afford such fancy digs. Meanwhile, if you're looking to buy in Southeast Portland, it's somewhat (?) more reasonable if you have an annual income of $107,931—for the neighborhoods where houses are going for $413,236. Here's what you'd need to earn in other neighborhoods.

• Hear ye! Hear ye! It's time for another hilarious edition of The Trash Report from Elinor Jones! This week she's elbow deep in celebrity & political gossip, featuring big gay wins for Democrats, Tiffany Trump's rainy wedding day 😢, and for god's sake leave dreamy Chris Evans ALONE.

• Let's hope Rene Gonzalez will clean up this hellhole as promised:


• A suspect has been charged in the Sunday shooting deaths of three football players at the University of Virginia, which also injured two others. The shooter has been charged with murder. (For those keeping score, we're drawing close to 600 mass shootings this year alone.)

• While Democrats are holding on to control of the Senate, it's looking more and more as if Republicans will barely take the House, though 18 races still haven't been called. According to Prez Biden, Dems will not have the votes necessary to codify abortion rights—unless, you know, Republicans suddenly develop a conscience. 🙄

• Amazon is reportedly planning to lay off thousands of employees (like, around 10,000) mostly from their devices, retail, and interestingly, in their HR divisions—you know, in case any employee wanted to complain about it.

• Today in "Shocking NO ONE": "Dave Chappelle’s ‘SNL’ monologue sparks backlash as being antisemitic."

• And finally... "Mondays," amirite?