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Good Morning, Portland!  The time has come (lol)! HUMP 2023 tickets just dropped, and you have until Dec 31 to scoop 'em up at presale prices! Now let's scoop the news!

IN LOCAL NEWS:
• ICYMI: In a recent report, the city’s Police Review Board detailed why the Portland police officer who killed Robert Delgado in April 2021 faced no discipline from the city. Then the advisory board urged the city to… buy more shields?! News Editor Alex Zielinski has the story.

• A new analysis from Investigate West reports that half of CenturyLink customers in Seattle's lower-income areas and neighborhoods with more residents of color experience slow internet. Portland was similarly disparate.

• This week in just fucking frightening: A 32-year-old Portland woman faces charges of pushing a 3-year-old child onto the MAX tracks on Wednesday—afterward, according to the Oregonian, the child complained of "a severe headache and had a small red mark on her forehead." KOIN reports that the woman's defense requested she not be released, but objected to the idea of not setting bail. That descision is scheduled to be made Friday. 

• Once again, Trimet is offering free fare on buses and trains on NYE, starting at 8 pm. MAX trains will run late into the new year, with all but MAX Red Line running until at least 2 am. Bus schedules remain the same—though fareless. The streetcar will also be free, but you're probably going to move faster walking, amirite? But, if you wore uncomfortable shoes that could be useful for you, Dolores.

• Still firming up your NYE plans? Check out this megalist of our weekly music column's reccomended NYE shows:

• Spent too much on presents? We've got 21 Cheap and Easy NYE Events in Portland where you can party for less than the cost of a 2023 laminated wall calendar (clearly, I will be partying by filling out that calendar)—all of them are under $25!

• The last Pop Quiz PDX has arrived, and includes no less than SEVEN kitten photos. This week, your job is to guess HOW THE MAJORITY OF PORTLANDERS VOTED in each question—starting off with a subjective investigation into which Spice Girl the majority of Portlanders want to be reincarnated as? CLEARLY BABY, RIGHT? RIGHT? BABY IS THE BEST SPICE, YES? Check the quiz to find out—although Baby Spice is unequivocally the correct answer, regardless.

IN NATIONAL / INTERNATIONAL NEWS:
• According to a recent study from research firm AH Datalytics murders in large US cities are down more than 5 percent, on a national level.

• The BBC reports that a hacker called "Ryushi" claims to have acquired the private data of over 400 million Twitter accounts by exploiting a system data collection loophole. Personal data from US Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and broadcaster Piers Morgan, whose Twitter account was recently hacked, is allegedly among the the effected accounts.

• Fashion mogul Vivienne Westwood has died. She was 81. Her name may conjure visions of couture fashion and unaffordable runway designs, but the groundbreaking designer essentially made her name clothing punk fashion icons in the '70s, from a boutique called SEX that she ran with the Sex Pistols manager Malcolm McLaren. Over the course of her long life, she pulled a number of boisterous and irreverent stunts. Vanity Fair has a good obituary, and the New York Times put together a lookbook. It will be a very long time before her name is forgotten.

• Sweet Jesus Protect and Preserve Us, I had no idea that Kabosu—the charming Shiba Inu best known online as Doge—was even still alive. She is, she's 17 years old, and over the holidays she gave her family and fans quite a big frighten, when she stopped eating and drinking (soft-hearted warning, that link goes to an IG picture of a cat comforting Kabosu 😭).  Doge's owner Atsuko Sato revealed that the the dog has been living with chronic lymphoma leukaemia. But the BBC now reports that as of Friday, Kabosu's owner says she's doing much better.

• If your flight was one of the thousands Southwest Airlines cancelled over the holidays, the Washington Post TikTok made a pretty sweet and brief video about getting reimbursed for your alternate travel expenses.

@washingtonpost Southwest says it will honor “reasonable requests” for reimbursement for alternate transportation. #southwestairlines #canceledflights ♬ original sound - We are a newspaper.