You’re a bit odd and seem very socially awkward yet I still give you the thin smile with a “Hello” in the morning. When we pass in the break room, we’ll exchange very little office jargon but you make if very uncomfortable with your body language and tone to go beyond that. Basically, you give the impression you don’t want anyone to talk to you so I respect that.
But in the very crowded elevator, I have my ear buds in, scrolling through my Instagram and you have no qualms about tapping my shoulder to share your thoughts on what’s scrolling on my screen.
I feel incredibly uncomfortable, slightly violated. I turn off my phone, turn the volume up in my ear buds and before placing them back in place I tell you, “Please don’t do that again.”
We had the most uncomfortable minute ride down to the first floor in history.

19 replies on “Dear Socially Awkward Office Mate”

  1. > I feel incredibly uncomfortable, slightly violated.

    I’m sorry but this is melodrama of the highest magnitude. A co-worker, someone you ‘know’, and someone you know is socially awkward/shy, tries to break out of their shell and make small talk and you shoot back with “don’t do that again”.

    Then you wonder why they’re socially awkward?

    > We had the most uncomfortable minute ride down to the first floor in history.

    Thanks to you.

  3. Wow, I’m sure it made your day to be able to fire back that “mind your own business” snark to the poor socially awkward person. What. A. Jerk.

  4. It like that when that scared stray kitten you rescued finally comes out from behind the couch and you promptly kick it in the head.

    You are an asshole.

  5. LOL… I’m FLOORED that out of all the A,I, the readers are not agreeing with the author!! It’s SO fucking rude to look at someone’s phone, especially someone who isn’t your friend – the social weirdo in the office looks at your phone and it’s now your responsibility to include him in your IG? Your social circle? I’m quite disappointed by the above comments because if you were on the bus, elevator – where ever and that weirdo tapped you to discuss what’s going on on your screen – what if it was a text message?? You’d RANT YOUR FUCKING MINDS OFF.

  7. How ironic that someone who uses his cell phone in a crowded elevator, with earbuds plugged in, deems someone else to be socially awkward.

  9. Meh. I’ll wait to type out a witty defense in a crowded elevator and wait for the opinion of a weirdo to chime in.

  10. I/A are you sure about his body language in the break room? He’s shy and clams up when you walk in the room. His timing and technique are terrible when he finally bellies up to the bar. If he apologizes do you lecture him on private space and blow him off? Do you let him off the hook and have a snack with him? When are you gonna hit us with Socially Awkward Stud, the Sequel?

  11. This is the visual equivalent of having a loud conversation on the bus, then getting mad at your fellow passengers for laughing at the idiocy you’re broadcasting. If your instagram is that private, you should look at it somewhere private.

  13. “LOL… I’m FLOORED that out of all the A,I, the readers are not agreeing with the author!!”

    Um, there was four comments at the time you posted this.

  16. I’Anon,he sounds like he does understand he is crossing the line. Just know I agree with you. A crowded elevator is a place most people need solace. You do not have to be touched by the office droan because he read more into your acknowledgement of his existence.You are not the poster child for being fondled.

  18. A simple little toot could have caused him to back off without crushing what little self esteem he had left.

    It still would have been an uncomfortable ride.

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