One night last summer at about 1 am, a group of you woke me up with a loud argument about where you’d parked your car after Last Thursday. You were a few houses down by the time I began following you, and I remained hidden for at least 20 minutes as you bickered and stumbled around the block looking for your fully Yakima’d Subaru Outback. By the time you found it, I was convinced that all four of you were incapable of driving it, and I took matters into my own hands: I called 911 and reported your ass for drunk driving. As soon as I hung up I fired up my police scanner app and got to hear, a few minutes later, a car fitting your description getting pulled over. One suspect, taken into custody for DUII. I felt so good about this I’ve rearranged my work schedule for this summer. That means I’ll now get to stay up late every Last Thursday, hunting you assholes down and feeding your plate numbers to the po-po. Happy trails, shitbirds!—Anonymous
I, Anonymous
Your Last Thursday
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MFADD. Except its not really an organization. Its just one super creepy guy with no friends, no life and all the time in the world to snitch people from the bushes. No wonder you are anonymous.
mrrightyerwrong you are a total fucking douche bag the word “snitch” doesn’t apply here as who this person is is an individual doing their civic duty by reporting a bunch of drunk ass idiots who are too stupid to figure out that you can’t drive around fucked up. you think it’s cool to drive around our fair city wasted with all your bro’s bro? If you see someone committing a serious crime say like rape or murder child abuse would you too not call the police and do some “snitching”? Having had a family member who went through the horrific experience of killing their best friend while drunk driving i can attest to the fact that they would have welcomed a good samaritan bush creeper calling the cops on them as opposed to vehicular manslaughter and a lifetime of guilt. you sir need to check your head.
justsayinderp; you are a tool and a not very sharp one.
before you start annointing this iAnon as some sort of superhero question why he isnt STOPPING the alleged drunk drivers BEFORE they get in their car and start rolling down the road plowing people? Because thats NOT what he’s doing. As he said he is simply using the police to get back at people who drive cooler cars than him (yakima’d? I guess?) and who woke his sorry ass up having late night fun.
What a reactionist little weak shred of crying towel you are.
Ah, so he should shoot out their tires or wrassle their keys from them?
Drunk drivers suck, and it’s ridiculous how ubiquitous it is in Portland and especially at events like Last Thursday that only exist for drinking, drugging, and driving.
Another vote here for justsayinderp and iAnon. It is much better for drunk fuckwads to get in trouble than for innocent people to get killed. AND, it is much better and safer to let the police handle said drunk fuckwads than to try to handle a whole group of them yourself. Duh.
While I strongly prefer for drunkards to NOT drive, I also prefer for pompous self important anons to brag about it to the I, Anonymous. So in the future, do your “civic duty” anon, but pat yourself on the back in private.