To the cute little restaurant I ordered a salad roll from the other night. I know you are on D Street, and that makes you trendy now. You used to be just a little place to eat not far from other white trash destinations, like the Oregon Theater where countless people used to masturbate publicly. I know you want to be trendy sooooo bad, but cilantro, really. It’s already in everything that doesn’t need it.
I think you suck for sneaking it into my food. Anywhere that serves it should be required to list it next to the food allergens in a category labeled ‘My God, Why?’
And before you try telling me it’s good, just know you won’t convince me. It tastes like aluminum foil and hate.
You know what else is supposed to taste good? Fucking anti-freeze. So why don’t you go try that and let me know if it agrees with you.

When you call Division, “D Street”, you’re part of the problem, not part of the solution.
Is this seriously a rant against cilantro? Are you fucking kidding me?
I feel you. I am the same way with sweet pickles. Stupid fucking culinary asshole types! Now I’m just flipping PISSED!
Cilantro is a very traditional ingredient in salad rolls. Don’t like it, don’t order them. It sounds like you have the palate of a spoiled 2 year old. Stick to hot pockets and other crap more up your alley.
To be fair, I do wish everything you eat from now until your last day has cilantro in it. I can totally understand why they snuck it into your food.
Are you seriously fucking surprised that there was cilantro in a salad roll? What sucker did you get to type this up for you because you’re clearly a full on retard.
You should see what cilantro gets put into at the Oregon Theater!
Anti-freeze + Cilantro. Isn’t that one of the new flavors at Salt and Straw?
Ugh, there is fucking SALAD in my salad roll!
Cilantro is delicious. Smells great. Tastes like grass. What’s the problem with that?
I do not know the cute little restaurant you are talking about, but I don’t like Cilantro either. So many people put it in their food and love it, so maybe we are just in the minority. I think it taste like a breath mint. or cough medicine. They were very devious to sneak it into your food, but stay calm.
You have zero real problems in your life.
You’re used to McDonald’s McCilantro-free salad rolls. I get it now.
Some people are genetically predisposed to hating cilantro. It coincides with being completely insufferable.
Cilantransplant.
first world problems. i liked the comment about D street at the top. and i agree. LOL
Are you talking about the one and only Frank Silantra?
Only someone from the midwest would know cilantro is not a common ingredient in salad rolls! Back to Iowa with you!
You say “countless people used to masturbate publicly” as if that’s a bad thing.
anti freeze taste good? okay.