[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds]
I really don’t miss the seeming 60% of you who are now having to find alternative methods to drive to/from work/home these next few weeks. My route was not impacted at all but I find myself with more space, less honks and flashing lights and speeding lunatics – that is to say – more peace each morning since I-5 closed. I know you’re all out there somewhere, sitting at different intersections, your heads in your hands, angrily lifting your feet off pedals every other second to inch closer to the (also stopped) cars in front of you, hands hovering over the horn symbol embossed on the faux(?) leather columns in between your legs… why are you in such a rush, anyway? Trying to get home in time to stare at another screen and forget who you are? Maybe work on your boredom and capacity for letting your mind wander. It’s so much more fun to drive the speed limit without you.
Any chance we can keep I-5 closed?—Anonymous