Yes, you luuuuuuuuuv Portland. You even bought the sticker of the outline of the state of Oregon w the little green heart over Portland and slapped it on your left-rear windshield. You can’t stop talking about Portland. It’s so hip! And kooky! And so much cheaper than California! and bla bla Salt & Straw bla bla bla foodcarts bla bla beer and coffee bla bla bla

But see, here’s the thing: That window sticker doesn’t do us any good here. Nor do your frikking California license plates. If you “love” PDX so much then do us a favor: GET YOUR CAR REGISTERED. Our community could use the measly 100 tax dollars you’re too cheap and selfish to spend on this place you claim to love so much. How ’bout helping us pay for the increased road maintenance, policing,firefighters and other state and city services that we find ourselves needing to handle the influx of people like you?? Register your damn car.

15 replies on “Register Your Damn Car, Newbie A-hole”

  1. actually, it costs like $400 to register your car here, once they’ve gouged you for every little thing. can’t say I blame anyone for forgoeing that process. sorry charlie.

  2. Just imagine how many of these devious Californians are secretly among us, riding bikes and not paying a damn cent to fix up the roads. That’s the real evil.

  3. Ho brah, but I just got here from Hawai’i. I promise I’ll change my tags and register the car I paid like a grand to ship over to the mainland in like the next four years or so, mahalo…

  4. IA said “Salt and Straw”, mentioned “foodcarts” AND dissed a transplant. By my reckoning, that’s three shots or bong hits for everyone under the IA game rules.

  5. I call weak sauce. As if this blog isn’t already flooded with unoriginal newbie hating whiners. You’re really scraping the bottom of the barrel complaining about people’s registration stickers. Seriously, get a life.

  6. What gets me is seeing these vehicles with outta state plates (let’s not forget to hate on Minnesota and Wisconsin) with a neighborhood parking permit pasted on their windows, like why wouldn’t the permit issuers check that shit out? Why are they approving permits for cars that aren’t registered in Oregon? Presumably those drivers are living here.

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