15 K participants: Serious proposal here. Can we get a fart moratorium for the first half mile of the big run Sunday?
I understand farting is your right, not a privilege and if you are out there at dark thirty with 30 thousand of your new best friends doing something healthy (for once) you sure as hell not going to hold your sphincter.
Well consider, there ARE some kids (and short people) who have no choice butt to run behind you at ass level. How pleasant would it be for them NOT to have to smell your beef until the throngs thin out at Broadway?
I mean c’mon dudes and dudettes, keeping a cork in it for a few blocks should be doable shouldnt it?
since I,A evidently likes to sniff only their own farts i rather expect them to be also posting comments about their own post soon.
I think anonie has forgotten that we’re talking about runners here, who tend to act like they believe they’re doing something far more important than what they’re actually doing.
He who I, ANONed it spawned it.
you are going to get hit with snot rockets.
Here’s hoping the author experiences Shamrock SHART party!!!!
You think the gaseous form is bad, wait until you start experiencing the liquid/semi-solid version.
nothing says diarrhea like running followed by clam chowder and Widmer
Bottom sauce.
Seeing as how the Shamrock Run is a shitshow anyway, farting is completely appropriate.
If you’re worried about amateur hour, enter a real race, not one where they run out of water at the first two stations and medals (more importantly–medals/BOTTLE OPENERS) at the end, even though the race has been around for decades. There are far better organized races out there.
No guarantees people won’t fart in any given race, but at the Shamrock Run, the night after people have filled themselves with Guinness? It’s guaranteed.
This’ll definitely keep you “ahead of the crowd”.
I think farts get a real “bum” rap. Other than in 20 million years they might cut a hole in the ionosphere’ (there’s a sound provable theory) farts are important and necessary. They provide relief which contributes to general well being and comfort. Benjamin Franklin wrote an essay with plaudits for “breaking wind” and he was a smart feller. A freaking forefather for cry eye he was he was. I wear a sort of tool belt around the house equipped with rose smelly spray (my wife likes that idea, but wishes I used it more). Which brings up another point. All my farts don’t smell, only some are pretty deadly, like after eating a boiled egg or two. Smells are a relative thing. They don’t cause bleeding or pain, just embarrassment. Let’s change all that. I see the forming of the National Flatulence Party and the young peoples auxiliary the Teen Tooters fighting real toxic waste. I hope to see in the next big election lots of “brown states”. With the right campaigning our party could “wipeout” the tight assed conservatives and bring a new twist to “go green”. God tie me down before I hurt myself.
If I won’t spare people on MAX I won’t spare you, silly jogger person!