THURSDAY, MARCH 17
6:30 CBS NCAA TOURNAMENT Wanna know why your TV is filled with crappy repeats this week? Thank college basketball!
8:00 FOX THE O.C. Seth is determined to bring back the “fun and spirit” of last year–which means Marissa hitting the bottle and Ryan getting into fistfights each week.
FRIDAY, MARCH 18
8:00 FOX BERNIE MAC When Jordan makes a celebrity prank call, he gets a horrifying house visit from wrestler Triple H!
10:00 SCIFI BATTLESTAR GALACTICA Richard Hatch (Apollo on the original series) guest stars as a terrorist running for president.
SATURDAY, MARCH 19
8:00 WB ROBOCOP–Movie (1987) A dead Detroit cop returns as an ass-kickin’ cyborg. Spread ’em, citizen!
8:00 ABC THE TEN COMMANDMENTS–Movie (1956) God helps Moses free his people, then allows them to wander the desert for 40 years. You know, maybe God doesn’t like us as much as we think…
SUNDAY, MARCH 20
8:30 FOX ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT George-Michael runs for student body president, while Gob inexplicably launches an offensive campaign.
9:00 CBS SPRING BREAK SHARK ATTACK–Movie (2005) It’s a “kegger of death” when ass-chompin’ sharks tear smart-ass college kids to shreds. YEAH!
MONDAY, MARCH 21
9:00 FOX 24 Now that Michelle is the new boss, Tony can expect a trip to the torture room… and plenty of HOT SEX.
TUESDAY, MARCH 22
9:00 FOX THE STARLET For the love of god, do NOT miss this heee-larious new reality show featuring the most butt-clenchingly awful actresses EVER!
10:00 FX THE SHIELD Vic worms his way around the new strict Cap’n (Glenn Close) in an attempt to find an old pal’s missing daughter.
WEDNESDAY, MARCH 23
9:00 ABC ALIAS Nadia’s newest enemy is an old boyfriend–which can’t make fat Keanu Reeves very happy.
9:30 FOX LIFE ON A STICK Debut! A new high school comedy in the humiliating style of Freaks & Geeks–but not as funny.