GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! And keep talking that mess, that’s fine. Could you walk and talk at the same time? LET’S GO TO PRESS.

A massive manhunt is underway in Los Angeles following two gunman firing on an LAPD patrol car Sunday night.

A Ferguson police spokesman is placed on unpaid leave after calling a memorial to Michael Brown a “pile of trash.” (Again… the police spokesman said this.)

The Interview is now the number one online film rental of all time, making a whopping $15 million. North Korea, Hollywood thanks you.

The US-led military coalition formally and finally ended their looooong-running war in Afghanistan—though thousands of troops still remain.

More political trouble for Greece after the country failed to elect a leader, which means parliament must be dissolved within 10 days and elections will be called within 30.

An AirAsia flight disappeared on Sunday morning over the Java Sea, and authorities are fearing the worst.

A Greek ferry catches on fire off the coast of Albania in stormy seas, forcing an panicked evacuation. Though seven are dead, 400 were rescued.

While celebrating her birthday at Disneyland, diva Christina Aguilera reportedly snapped and called Mickey Mouse an “asshole.” (In her defense, he is kind of an asshole.)

In sport, the Blazers destroyed the Knicks last night at the Moda Center. Check out all the hot live blog action courtesy of this recap from Blogtown’s own Rob Simonsen.

Now here’s what’s going on in your neck of the woods: Partly cloudy today with a high of 42—but sunny and very cold tomorrow!

And finally… “This is Drone One to base. We have eyes on the kangaroo. Repeat: We have eyes on the kangaroo. Moving in closer, and… OH GOD!! KANGAROOS ARE MEAN! REPEAT: KANGAROOS ARE MEAN!!“

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=//www.youtube.com/embed/EZjFz5iN8BE

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)