Hoo boy. The O begins Friday in fine, troll-feeding fashion with a story about how ODOT agrees that the Portland’s highways are too crowded, and is half-heartedly pointing fingers at the folks who killed the CRC as part of the reason. The comments are already hopping with light rail hatred. Everyone please take a moment to learn about induced demand.

What do you do when you’ve just sold your bakery for a cool $275 million? Chill out and collect African masks is Dave Dahl’s plan.

District Attorney Rod Underhill is working to make sure police aren’t improperly using informants, as has been known to happen.

Thanks to “weed celebrity” Jorge Cervantes, who dropped off his Cannabis Encyclopedia at the Merc yesterday, but left before I could run up stairs and chat with him. The O did an interview.

More fallout from the University of Oregon’s bungled, vindictive handling of rape accusations against several basketball players: Now the counselor who spoke with the alleged victim is suing.

“Every event we go to — the Boone County Eisenhower Social, the Black Hawk County Lincoln ­Dinner, the boots-and-barbecue down in Denison — the Trump people are everywhere with literature and T-shirts and signing people up.” Donald Trump is going to bamboozle the people of Iowa, everybody.

The American flag rises in Havana once again.

Everyone wants Japan’s Prime Minister to personally apologize for the nation’s behavior 70 years ago. Not happening.

Rejoice! Glenn Beck names Portland his top city to “avoid like the plague” —sadly only because one study calls us the least-religious burg in the country. He should hate us for different and better reasons.

I was just saying last night that people from Oregon know NOTHING about roller coasters, and that Cedar Point in Sandusky, OH, is the finest amusement park on the planet. Now there’s news that a man was killed there yesterday, after hopping a fence to get his wallet. Important question, midwest transplants: What is the best roller coaster at Cedar Point (there is an objectively correct answer).

Some rain, maybe?!

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You’ve been waiting all week for your Friday desk/couch/cafe karaoke challenge. This week takes a contemplative turn. Watch out for that bridge, Portland. It’ll get you.

I'm a news reporter for the Mercury. I've spent a lot of the last decade in journalism — covering tragedy and chicanery in the hills of southwest Missouri, politics in Washington, D.C., and other matters...

5 replies on “Good Morning, News: Portland’s Highways Are Packed, Glenn Beck Hates You, and An Important Roller Coaster Question”

  4. The Mantis was way better the second time I tried it. The Raptor, which killed the guy yesterday, actually got worse for me. The Millennium Force is extreme, it’s true, but I’m a die-hard Magnum XL-200 guy.

  5. While I cannot comment on the best rollar-coaster in an unfortunate part of our Country, I will offer this opinion:

    Japan has already apologized more than is ever needed.
    That is, unless we demand apologies every 10 years for the sins of our grandparents, and great-grandparents and beyond…
    In which case, we, as the USA should commence with apologizing every 10 years for our sins too.

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