Guys! Rita and Frank just got a new Mac for Frank’s 84th birthday, and they’re trying to send you a picture of them, and… wait. Did you hear the click? Hit that button. No, not that one… the other one, the one with… wait. Just stop for a second, okay? Did you try… WAS THAT THE CLICK? …no. Look, go to system preferences. It’s up on the left. UNDER THE APPLE. No, not literally under the apple, it’s… WAS THAT THE CLICK??
Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.) More by Wm. Steven Humphrey
58 goddamn years of marriage, you’d think the old SOB would hear a click once in a while.
mom, dad, stop it!
“I bought my Husband at American Apparel” – “Noooooo”