HEY ZOMBIE ABE LINCOLN! What do you call it when a bunch of faggy liberals steals your hard-won taxes and uses them to feed the homeless? What do you call it? I SAID, WHAT DO YOU CALL IT???

(For Zombie Able Lincoln’s answer, watch the following video paid for by Republican Rick Barber for Congress. And if you’re not completely creeped out by the end of his ad, hang around for a special song which will take you even further down the horror rabbit hole.)

https://youtube.com/watch?v=kn14RwuJJRg%26hl%3Den_US%26fs%3D1%26

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

3 replies on “Rick Barber for Congress… and for Scaring the Shit Out of You with Zombie Abe Lincoln”

  1. Great cameo from Dale “Don’t Give a Rip” Peterson, former candidate for Alabama Agriculture Commissioner.

  3. Two notes:

    1.) Rick- Comparing paying taxes on the money someone makes selling revolutionary war memorabilia (so that we can “provide for the general welfare…” and such) to being ENSLAVED BY ANOTHER RACE AND FORCED TO WORK FOR COUNTLESS HOURS IN FIELDS WITH THE CONSTANT FEAR OF DEATH might be just a little… no, REALLY FUCKING INSENSITIVE! How ’bout you figure out how many slavery descendants there are on food-stamps before you start calling your drinking buddies ‘slaves to the government’.

    2.) Patriotic “Star-Spangled Banner” singer- skipping the first verse doesn’t hide the fact that you suck.

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