By now you’ve probably seen some of the new billboards that’re stirring up interest in the 2011 MLS-ified Timbers, the work of former W+K ad director Jelly Helm (with an assist from OMFG Co., who also have a hand in newish sports bar Spirit of 77):
- Jelly Helm Studio
MLS Soccer.com just published a piece today on the campaign, which notes that three are up so far, and there are 12 more in chute (including one that features someone I once dated, briefly, a looooong time ago, and no it isn’t Timber Jim). The article calls them “the most talked-about billboards in Portland,” but I haven’t heard much in way of response yet. A few comments from the MLS Soccer.com piece to get the discussion started:
“What the F does logging have to do with football?! Makes Portland look like a bunch of hillbillies. I guess it’s kinda fitting though…”
“I hope Portland builds a strong franchise. I’d love nothing more than to have Seattle, Vancouver, and Portland be the top 3 in attendance in 2011.”
“Its great how Portland had big brother Seattle to hold their hand on marketing their club. The Timbers owners met with Sounders owners on how to get their “brand” moving. They even have a Seattle company for their shirt sponsor (Alaska Airlines). Portland is like the little brother who is jealous of the older brother (Seattle) and the older brother can care less.”
“Right… So is Portland all just a bunch of Axe murderers?”
Closer shots of more of the billboards after the cut.
We saw the No Pity / Chick with Axe one while waiting for cart lunch the other day, and completely loved it. The two person saw one is badass, too.
In fact, the “older brother” spends nearly all of his time trying to care less.
Both Abe and Katie do have a glazed over, “I’m gonna use this to kill you” look to them. But this campaign is, so far, pretty kickass. The “No Pity” TV campaign is also based on a lot of logging imagery, and it rocks, too. Seattle’s just jealous because the best thing they could do for a “Sounder” was to hire a marching band.
WE’RE ALL
LUMBERJACKS
AND WE’RE
OK
Does this mean that the 107 is now an actual official part of the Timbers?
These are bad ass. Can’t wait for the rest.
They look awful, please for the love of dog take them down!
We’ve ALL dated pitilessness, Marjorie.
This is bad ass? Glossy billboards advertising a millionaire republican’s plaything of a sports franchise, which hark back to Portland’s pre-“creative class” days as a timber town? Now that most of Oregon’s actual loggers are out of work, and working families can’t afford to buy a house in Portland, it’s safe to market this dumb ass franchise as blue collar tough, eh?
Keep lapping up the marketing fluff, hipsters. Henry Paulson Jr. is laughing at you all the way to his daddy’s bank.
What Steve R said.
@Steve R
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Should I quit enjoying all the sports I do because they are the playthings of millionaires?
I think it’s an interesting choice to have the girl with the ax wearing an old Half and Half t-shirt. Such an obvious cross-marketing opportunity passed up for an odd bit of nostalgia.
I miss Half and Half. I never would’ve expected them to get an enormous downtown bulletin board…months after they closed.
As for the billboards? I like ’em, as billboards go. Sure beats Pepto Bismal or Budweiser ads.
@BlackedOut: PDX is getting screwed in the ass by Hank Fucking Goldman Sachs Paulson and his arrogant motherfucking failure of a scion in order to have “major league” soccer for the entertainment of a bunch dumb ass drunken man children. If that’s the sort of thing you like, far be it from me to discourage you from tossing your shekels into his hat.
Hipsters getting all giddy over some slick corporate marketing hype: Where’s the sense of irony, for the love of god?
MLSsoccer.com commenters and Steve R = oregonlive.com commenters. Haters gotta hate.
Billboards look fine.
steve, bro, 1) you live in beaverton. 2) relying on the phrase “hipster” immediately disqualifies your opinion.
would you feel this way if the paulsons were getting us an NHL team?
Yeah, Steve stop pointing out the details that make our devotion to the Timbers suspect. I mean, we all want to keep imagining that soccer in PDX is organic and therefore, acceptable; not some corporate money making scheme (b/c if it was, it’s not very effective at it)
nah, mr.luchador
sports=$$$, duh. why argue about it? dragging tired stereotypes into it is what makes steve-0’s comment offensively stupid. slick marketing is slick marketing.
You’re so smart talking tree! Of course, sports = money; that shit is old-hat. My point was that if Richie Rich bought the Timbers to make money it’s not a very good investment (see also Allen, Paul)
yeah, what’s up with all these hipsters and they’re hipsterific bilboards. i hate hipster and their fixed-gear loving hipsterdom. stupid hipsters
@Steve R
Dude you’re really holding onto that whole guilt by association thing a little too much considering the city is really only on the hook for about $11 million and if the whole thing goes poof Merritt gave legal guarantees it would be paid back by his family.
I’m also about 400X the political wonk than you, which is clear because I can actually break out numbers and you just go “OMFG MERRITT PAULSON GOLDMAN SACHS RAWR.” Which in my book really isn’t a valid argument and just means you’re just as bad as the tea baggers but the leftist version of them.
For real. Are you just copying what you read in Bogdanski’s comment section? Hi Jack by the way…it’s been a while. let’s get coffee in a couple of weeks. You down?
@Steve R
Also I failed to mention I’m better than you. It’s true. Sorry, hippie. -Love the bleeding heart liberal that grasps reality.
Anybody know where I could get a Portland flag patch like the one on dudes vest in the top photo? I Know, I know, I’m a corporate consumerist whore, blah, blah
@Brononymous: 1) I don’t live in Beaverton and 2) I use the term hipster to get a rise out of dipshits who take offense to it. Thanks for playing. Re. NHL: no, I wouldn’t support subsidizing the Paulsons (or Paul Allen, or anybody) to bring NHL to Portland. (I *would* support a publicly owned rec center/rink with youth and adult leagues, though. It would cost way less and bring far more benefit to the community.)
@BlackedOut: when I served on PDC’s/Sammy’s RQSAC, the numbers we saw going to support the Paulson clan’s venture were quite a bit higher than $11 million over the life of the deal. That’s just the tip of the iceberg. It will ultimately cost the city many times that, including every spare penny from the spectator fund for 25 years. And unlike the NBA (we paid something like $34 million to subsidize Paul Allen’s Rose Garden, with bonds being paid off with the venue’s parking revenue), MLS is extremely unlikely to ever be a net contributor to the spectator fund. Just because Randy, Sam and Merritt say it’s a good deal doesn’t make it so.
This is not “guilt by association.” Henry Paulson is Henry Paulson, not an associate, and he owns something like 30% of Henry Jr.’s Timbers. He is at or near the top of the public enemy list with regard to taking profit while driving global finance to the brink of collapse and pushing millions into financial ruin. That’s not an exaggeration. Look it up. This motherfucker should be in jail (or up against the wall), not on the take from the City of Portland during one of the worst economic downturns in modern history.
If believing marketing and political hype gives you a better grasp of reality, you are definitely better at that than me. Tea bag on that, wonkmeister. Rawr.
“I believe virtually everything I read, and I think that is what makes me more of a selective human, than someone who doesn’t believe anything.” — David St. Hubbins
@Carl: sadly, I think the t-shirt choice probably had more to do with the “woodsy” designs on the half and half shirts than on any sort of nostalgic reference.
Speaking of, what did half and half do with their shirts? Now that they are gone, I really wish I had gotten one (I used to go there for coffee all the time, really miss it).
favorite comment on the article so far:
“Stupid hippies always crying about trees its a soccer site donkeys”
To the “WTF does logging have to do with football…” person. MOST team names are not sport referential. You don’t have the Cincinnati Hitters or the Phoenix Free Throws. Team names generally are meant to sound tough (and loggers generally have a rep as a tough lot) or to refer to something associated with their city. The trouble comes when the team moves. You get team names like the Utah Jazz (a state not particularly associated with music or the LA Lakers (what lake might that be?). Animal names are frequently used, and generally we’re talking about predators like, you know, Ducks and Beavers. 😛
@Amanda Bandana Thank you thank you for giving all these guys whatfor when they’re complaining about how the Timbers make no sense and yet they’re all sitting at home watching the oh-so-fierce Ducks and Beavers.
This truly is the land of the strange mascots.
@Stave R
>2) I use the term hipster to get a rise out of dipshits who take offense to it. Thanks for playing.
————
Thanks for playing what, the Trolling Game? (The above is the definitition of that term.) You’ve just admitted your argument isn’t even honest, set aside valid. Good job, genius.
@Stave R
>2) I use the term hipster to get a rise out of dipshits who take offense to it. Thanks for playing.
————
Thanks for playing what, the Trolling Game? (The above is the definitition of that term.) You’ve just admitted your argument isn’t even honest, set aside valid. Good job, genius.
“MLS is extremely unlikely to ever be a net contributor to the spectator fund.”
Spoken by someone who has never been to a Timbers match, the last few matches at PGE were sell-outs. Your whiney hippie rants will be an interesting flash in the pan when we look back in 20 years and the Tims are as permanent a fixture to Portland culture as the Blazers are. The Timbers Army came out in force and gave their opinion, City Council listened and we’ve got ourselves something to celebrat. Sports means business means jobs means taxes. Now go take your hurt butt to some other issue.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3-xI7hbCzI
Green is the color, bitch.